Jilted Lovers: Facebook Stalkers

[tenni]

A University of Western Ontario masters’ thesis has found a full 88 per cent of people after a breakup stalk their exes on Facebook.

Jilted lovers signed on to friends’ account to spy on the one who dumped them. They deleted pictures of those happier times. They pored over old messages or wall posts. They clicked agonized fingers on the guy or girl who replaced them.

“It’s so interesting right now, so different from before this technology existed. Once you broke up in the past, it was over,” media studies graduate student Veronika Lukacs told the Star after successfully defending her thesis.

• 86.2 per cent agreed or strongly agreed that Facebook is part of their daily routine.

• 70 per cent would use a friend’s account to keep track of a former girl or boyfriend secretly after deleting them on Facebook.
• 65.5 per cent updated their profiles once a month or more. Their number of friends ranged from 69 to 1,800 with 484 as the mean.
• 64 per cent reread or overanalyzed old messages or wall posts from their ex.
• 61 per cent were asked about the breakup when their relationship status changed.
• 50 per cent deleted an ex-partners pictures.
• 38 per cent altered their privacy controls on their Facebook accounts.
• 33 per cent changed their Facebook status to quote a song or lyric about the ex-partner.
• 31 per cent posted a picture in an attempt to make the ex jealous.
• 5.6 per cent posted a slanderous comment.

http://www.thestar.com/living/article/1234906--online-stalking-88-per-cent-of-jilted-lovers-admit-to-spying-on-their-exes

The role of social media may vary as a generational factor. Still an interesting study.

[Gearbox]

A neighbour broke into her husbands FB account after splitting. SHE was the one who cheated on him though, and tried it with me too. I think it's just nuts the lengths some will go to to keep their ex's in their lives, even if as a nuisance.:eek2:

[can i watch]

I dont do fb. I had a stalker a couple of years ago and the thought of him seeing or getting into my personal stuff is creepy. If I want to communicate with you, I have your phone number. I cannot do fb because of our fettish website, too easy for people to find me, and that would spoil the fun of it. My bf does because its a free marketing tool to promote his business. I have access to his account because I am his manager and I can post and add new promos to his site. The thing that drives me crazy is how some chicks are soooo forward with him....out of nowhere. My bf is HOT, no doubt. That is how Im marketing him...bring in the chicks and the dudes will follow > my motto. But.... I am thrilled and a little jealous of how models and strippers come onto him. Its what we are going for...but its still hard to see it. I want to say: Back Off > He's MINE! LOL But that would ruin the whole thing.:tongue:
I have a basic mistrust when it comes to fb. I find it a bit insane actually to have a constant stream of info coming at me..and its mostly people who feel the need to report that they just ate a grilled cheese sandwich and they loved it. REALLY? And why do I need to know this? The way I see it, it is a nessesary evil.

[DuckiesDarling]

Facebook can't be blamed for all the ills of the world, but it certainly made it easier to find information about people. I know in part I made a decision to file for divorce after being told one too many times he couldn't help out with gas money so I'd have enough to eat on during the work week when I was hauling the kids back and forth forty miles to see him as he was working in another town and staying at his parents house. Then I find pics where he was tagged on Facebook out partying and drinking and generally acting like he was single instead of a married father of three.

Do I still check out his profile? Occasionally, it's like a train wreck, can't help but look and laugh as his life continues to self destruct. Is it petty? Perhaps, but I consider it a reward for enduring 10 years of an infidelity filled marriage with a man who just never grew up and accepted responsiblity for anything, least of all the children he created.

That being said, there are lots of ways to find out information on anyone. Any time you do anything that goes into public record databases you are at risk for exposing infomration and don't even realize how much is there. Try it, google your name. There are sites like www.spokeo.com (http://www.spokeo.com) and others that will let you pay for background checks on people and even will give information about current address right down to street name as well as the value of the property. Scary world we live in, ain't it? Some sites will let you remove information but you have to contact them, don't ever just assume that you are not out there because you are, even if you aren't on a computer, you are still out in cyberspace in some database just for having a phone hooked up.

[keladry]

I just wanted to say that I really enjoy the name of this thread. It has a poetic sound to it : ]

[NjbiGuy01]

Lets not forget: The information age in general has changed the entire dynamic of personal relationships. Years ago you didn't have voice mail, you didn't have e-mails or messaging (sexting) or Tweeting pictures etc. You now have this ability to collect information on or about people, as well as what you send back and forth between one another. If things "go south", you have this collection of evidence that can be used against you and ruin you, if you are not careful. You also have the ability to put someone in a website by address, phone number, or their name, and find out lots more than you could in the past....the world is a different place for sure.

[æonpax]

I had joined FB way back when it was cool...meaning in like 2005. By 2009, me and other like-minded FB friends deleted our original accounts and came back with fake accounts. FB sells everything you post on their site...everything. Read their TOS, they own everything you post there.

Word to the wise.

[blugirl789]

i read somewhere some law student sued fb to obtain his file. i think finally he got back over 2,000 pages of everything. even deleted material still lived in his file. i think it's hilarious when ppl try and upload some app that will inform them of who was looking at their fb profile. that info will never be accessible.

the social dynamic has inevitably changed with the information age. but it was also significantly impacted with the invention of the telephone. also, the faster and more accessible transportation became, the social dynamic also became more accessible. i often wonder what the next evolution will be.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

I only got on FB because my oldest Grandson and my son asked me to. Come to find out half of my Lifestyle friends and family are on there too, Including some of my lovely friends from Here as well .lol I havent had any problems until a Homophobic bigot recently, who contacted me from another former co-worker. One that had already deleted him because of his "Fag hating" views. He saw my support of same-sex marriage and decided to, pardon the term, give me a ration of shit. What a mistake That was. Not only did I chew him out royally, but Almost all of my friends jumps his ass for his bigotted remarks to me about my sexual views and heritage.
Moral of the story: Before you attack someone, make sure their family and Extended family isnt going to eat your face off...lol
Ya'll's Cat

[pepperjack]

I had joined FB way back when it was cool...meaning in like 2005. By 2009, me and other like-minded FB friends deleted our original accounts and came back with fake accounts. FB sells everything you post on their site...everything. Read their TOS, they own everything you post there.

Word to the wise.


Thanks for confirming my suspicions; been reading some things; also been hearing it's considered a " time suck " & wholly agree. And it sure hasn't been doing well since going public.