Doctors

[SuckerMC]

Do your doctors know about your sexual activity?

[Grant_Norman]

No...none of them do...however, I did have to tell nurse at Health Dept when getting full battery of STD testing and I actually found it quite freeing - in closet other than partners - and she was first and only person I've ever told...she was pleasant and really didn't react at all.

[Jazminedress]

nope.......but I dont engage in high risk behavior

[by~his~side]

Great topic, Sucker! I think it's a great question and I hope there are responses that reflect that you guys are telling your doctors that you have had m/m sex.
Your Doctor is your doctor so why wouldn't you tell him?
If you're afraid he will judge you, then find a new doctor. Ditto if you're afraid he'll tell someone.
He's your doctor and therefore you are basically trusting him with your life. You'll go to him for sore throats, gout and skin rashes, right? No problem with the run of the mill stuff, right? What will you do that dreaded morning if you wake up with a chlamydial or gonococcal infection all over your bum? You'll need medicine, fellas and if your doctor already knows about your sexual habits then the trip to his office is going to be a lot less humiliating and the medicine not nearly as bitter.
Hubbys doctor knows. My doctor knows. We'd never wager our health over 45 seconds worth of mildly awkward conversation.

[Yoyopati]

If you get and endoscopy, your doctor and everyone in that room including the office staff will know.
Well if you had anal or if you play with dildos.

[delpark]

Something to consider- Health records are not as private as they were. Things get entered electronically and are accessible by other "health professionals". It is all for our own good, the government tells us.

[Leehebs]

Strangely enough living in a small island community, I would expect a positive std check to be all over the island in a few days. I would rather wait to go to the mainland and go to a Clinic than talk to my own Doctors

[Jazminedress]

If you're afraid he will judge you, What will you do that dreaded morning if you wake up with a chlamydial or gonococcal infection all over your bum? You'll need medicine, fellas and if your doctor already knows about your sexual habits then the trip to his office is going to be a lot less humiliating and the medicine not nearly as bitter.
Hubbys doctor knows. My doctor knows. We'd never wager our health over 45 seconds worth of mildly awkward conversation.

I respectfully think we are looking at multiple different issues here

In this day and age and political climate, people seem to feel based on who they voted for, rules, decorum, and respect may or may not need to be given. As an example, the kids and other half were taught and practiced answering if we kept guns in the house, because as much as I like my doctor, he could be a raving anti gunner, and you let one comment slip, he can have them removed easily (especially in commiefornia)

I just think, since my sex life is not a preventative issue, unless I have a problem, its not needed to discuss

[csreef]

When I was a member of a Bisexual support group, this topic came up, and just about everybody said that they wouldn't tell their doctor about their sex life.

B~H~S is right , you should tell your Doctor, but I think we don't tell either because of embarrassment, or that we may get a lecture from them.

[softheart]

I told mine "I'd rather not discuss it". So he probably got the idea.

[cornholejoe]

did regular blood tests and other things done so dont need to tell i come up clean so it dont matter

[Flypaper]

If asked for a clearly connected reason, I give the highlights ie “multiple partners, occasionally men, always safe sex except unprotected oral”. A good doctor won’t judge, and a bad one who does should be reported to the medical ethics board.

The most uncomfortable moment was a few a few years ago I had a battery of tests for something that briefly hospitalized me (I’m fine, and back to competitions), and the wife wondered why they were doing an HIV test - and whether she needed to be told anything. With negative results in hand, I said “of course not”. That’s the closest I’ve come to being fully open with her about my sexuality.


When I was a member of a Bisexual support group, this topic came up, and just about everybody said that they wouldn't tell their doctor about their sex life.

B~H~S is right , you should tell your Doctor, but I think we don't tell either because of embarrassment, or that we may get a lecture from them.

[Flypaper]

Im startled by your use of the pejorative “commiefornia”, especially in light of how open you’ve been with sharing your transitioning lifestyle. Would you be as comfortable with being so expressive in a more dogmatic “political climate”? I know for a fact that the current VP would have you - and most of us who’ve sucked cock - burnt at the stake.


I respectfully think we are looking at multiple different issues here

In this day and age and political climate, people seem to feel based on who they voted for, rules, decorum, and respect may or may not need to be given. As an example, the kids and other half were taught and practiced answering if we kept guns in the house, because as much as I like my doctor, he could be a raving anti gunner, and you let one comment slip, he can have them removed easily (especially in commiefornia)

I just think, since my sex life is not a preventative issue, unless I have a problem, its not needed to discuss

[sysper]

No...none of them do...however, I did have to tell nurse at Health Dept when getting full battery of STD testing and I actually found it quite freeing - in closet other than partners - and she was first and only person I've ever told...she was pleasant and really didn't react at all.
a nurse's job is to provide health services not judge.sounds like she was doing her job. kudos to her!

[Neonaught]

The US emperor recently decried that all healthcare "professionals" may refuse care to anyone that offends their personal religious beliefs. They call this "religious freedom" or something. Personally I call it disgusting.

[Jazminedress]

Im startled by your use of the pejorative “commiefornia”, especially in light of how open you’ve been with sharing your transitioning lifestyle. Would you be as comfortable with being so expressive in a more dogmatic “political climate”? I know for a fact that the current VP would have you - and most of us who’ve sucked cock - burnt at the stake.

i call it commiefornia because of the taxes, and unfortunately they are getting worse. We just paid all this money for a bullet train everyone said wouldnt work, after the spending, its cancelled. We have the most outrageous gas and registration fees. I have a 20 year old explorer that I keep because it runs so well, the registration got all the way down to $80, and sky rocketed back up to $150

They just announced a bunch of new taxes they are considering, other people call it taxefornia. We are losing tons of businesses that flat out said they cant afford it here. If you look at our unfunded liability, how the state isnt going to be bankrupt, I dont know, but thats the reason, the taxes

[lancer525]

i call it commiefornia because of the taxes, and unfortunately they are getting worse. We just paid all this money for a bullet train everyone said wouldnt work, after the spending, its cancelled. We have the most outrageous gas and registration fees. I have a 20 year old explorer that I keep because it runs so well, the registration got all the way down to $80, and sky rocketed back up to $150

They just announced a bunch of new taxes they are considering, other people call it taxefornia. We are losing tons of businesses that flat out said they cant afford it here. If you look at our unfunded liability, how the state isnt going to be bankrupt, I dont know, but thats the reason, the taxes

Wow, are you intentionally misrepresenting things, or are you just too ignorant to know?

You say "commie" as if it were some kind of slur against the 7th largest economy in the world.

I did my graduate work in California, and let me tell you the reason why taxes are so high. The conservitard "governator" cut taxes on corporations and the wealthy, necessitating higher taxes on the average person and the poor. Like you.

Instead of just spouting party-line echo chamber propaganda, why don't you just come farther out of the closet and admit you don't like brown people, don't know how taxation really works, and stop parroting the most hateful, divisive, vengeful political rhetoric of the last 100 years?

You clearly don't know what communism is, otherwise you wouldn't make such an idiot of yourself with cutesy slurs. Hint: It's an economic construct, not a political one.

Get a clue.

[Shelby57]

There is a clinic here that deals specifically in LGBTQ issues. I go there a few times a year to be tested and don’t have to worry about what I tell them. They also have advocates I can talk to about any questions or concerns I may have.
For normal stuff, I use my regular Dr.

If if you’re near Austin, look up The KIND Clinic.

[redngoldpride]

Our group is very diverse and discreet we have four members who are physicians both m/f and more than eight who are rn's they are very helpful with the screening process of potential new members and current members not to mention very helpful for most health concerns

[CurEUs_Male]

When I got a new Dr several years ago, I had to fill in a long, 4 page questionnaire. Tiny print too...
along near the bottom of page 3, a question about sexual partners. Two check boxes, __Male, __Female. I checked both... feeling a little 'wild' since the only others that knew were my wife and online connections.

This Dr. is a gem with patients (if you can get an appointment). As a new patient, a couple hours time. FOr an annual, an hour at least. He spends the time, he talks about the answers.
When he got to the sexual activity part, he was more worried about the function of things then judging. In fact, when I told he I had an interest in men as I was getting older, his response was "That's typical. Just be careful, and keep a condom with you if there something may happen. We'll include STI tests".

6 months later, I used the portal they are a part of now to ask for another set of STI tests, to keep current, the order was put in and I had the call a couple weeks later saying 'all normal'.

Your Dr. has a job. He or She is required by law to keep your privacy - if anyone with the knowledge shares testing results or any other information shared with your Dr., they are in violation of HIPPA regulations and there are significant sanctions, including losing their livelihood. In fact, if they *knowingly* share information, it is likely a 3rd tier offense, with $10K-50k per incident, up to $1.5m/year. That is no joking matter.
Neither is your health, sexual, mental, or otherwise. Let your Dr. know what you are up to, so they can do their job. You wouldn't try and get your mechanic to work on your engine without knowing information about it...

[by~his~side]

Wow, are you intentionally misrepresenting things, or are you just too ignorant to know?

You say "commie" as if it were some kind of slur against the 7th largest economy in the world.

I did my graduate work in California, and let me tell you the reason why taxes are so high. The conservitard "governator" cut taxes on corporations and the wealthy, necessitating higher taxes on the average person and the poor. Like you.

Instead of just spouting party-line echo chamber propaganda, why don't you just come farther out of the closet and admit you don't like brown people, don't know how taxation really works, and stop parroting the most hateful, divisive, vengeful political rhetoric of the last 100 years?

You clearly don't know what communism is, otherwise you wouldn't make such an idiot of yourself with cutesy slurs. Hint: It's an economic construct, not a political one.

Get a clue.

Lancer, how about we not attack other members of this community publicly in the forums, ok?
If you don't agree with something, please disagree respectfully - without name calling and condescension. Or move the conversation to a private message.
I'm very sure many of us here thank you in advance for your future co operation!

Dee

[Fresia]

@lancer, we dont want the troll bullying anymore. to many members left cause of the fighting. thanks in advance
@bhs, thanks for trying to keep it clean

[Jazminedress]

I apoligize for my part in this.........and maybe I could have worded things better. Lancer if you would like to have a respectful conversation on this side subject I welcome it, while it has been many years since I got my degrees, macroeconomics have not changed much.

I welcome any debate without name calling or insult, or denegrating into accusations..................but I do apoligize it went sideways from the OP subject which is an important one

[Jazminedress]

__Male, __Female. I checked both... feeling a little 'wild' since the only others that knew were my wife and online connections.
"That's typical. Just be careful, and keep a condom with you if there something may happen. We'll include STI tests".


I do the same thing with race, turned out my DNA test had some Nigerian in it.................................but I am real curious about his comment of "Thats Typical". I have never heard of a corelation of getting older and same sex relationships

[Yoyome100]

The person who obviously went of topic 1st and decided to use inflammatory rhetoric was not Lancer. Civil discussion is a 2 way street. I agree that we need to keep the site civil since we all have seen where it leads.

[sysper]

i don't have any hard facts but i've heard people tend to become more openminded sexually as they get older. specifically men with other men.
think about it, how many people here are under 50? (well me for 1 but not by much...)
it seems younger people aren't as adventurous as they were in past years which disappoints me very much. it's like they have unnecessary hangups. maybe it's a generational thing. seems people in the 60's & 70's felt freer to do there thing. the aids scare in the 80's did alot to cut down on that. to take the conversation back to doctors lol. so safe sex has become more important overtime. but it doesn't mean we should stop having sex!
I do the same thing with race, turned out my DNA test had some Nigerian in it.................................but I am real curious about his comment of "Thats Typical". I have never heard of a corelation of getting older and same sex relationships

[SilkyHoseLover]

<snip>... I am real curious about his comment of "Thats Typical". I have never heard of a corelation of getting older and same sex relationships
Don't know if there's ever been anything like a legitimate study or survey to determine this, but there seems to substantial anecdotal evidence that suggests this may be the case. It's a recurring theme that I've seen in this forum, and on other sites, such as Silverdaddies, where guys are looking to make M-M connections. Perhaps I'm more aware of it because I fit both the demographics and the circumstances -- I was never cognizant of any same-gender attraction until I hit my late 50s.

You see it time-after-time in profiles: 'Wife lost interest in sex after menopause', 'In a sexless marriage, but still horny', etc. That's only one aspect of it, but I think it's a significant one. There are also a number of men whose wives, even if they are younger, simply won't give them, sexually, what they want. (or think that they want)

A lot of older guys like me grew up at a time when there was a distinct difference in the clothes that girls wore, and we liked it! They were soft and feminine -- they looked nice and felt nice when you could touch them. And, for men who crave blowjobs, many wives flatly refuse, or, if they acquiesce, their lack of enthusiasm and the 'lets get this over with' attitude detracts from the experience.

Whether it's mis-perception on my part or not, it seems like an older guy these days stands a better chance of having a satisfying sexual relationship with another man than with a woman.

[Jazminedress]

good points, I have to think on that for a while, I grew up in a place where I didnt know that some people I went to school with were gay, it just didnt happen then and there.
But those are all very good points

[SilkyHoseLover]

I grew up in a place where I didnt know that some people I went to school with were gay, it just didnt happen then and there.

Yes, growing up in the 50s and 60s was a very different experience than one has these days. Homosexuality wasn't discussed openly, although most of my peers poked gentle fun at 'queers'. Those who were gay, mostly seemed to conceal it. There were a couple of guys I knew who 'fit the profile' and stereotypes -- appearing somewhat effeminate, not athletic, maybe a telltale speech pattern -- but it was so out-of-the-realm of discussion, that I can't say that I actually 'knew' a gay male until long after I became an adult. Guess I could say that it wasn't something that was on my radar screen. I basically didn't care. I had my own 'weird desires', so I wasn't about to look down on someone else because of what he wanted, sexually.

[Christopher South]

When I started playing with guys I was very open with my doctor. I told her I had engaged in risky sexual behavior and thought I should get tested. She asked if "she" was a prostitute and I explained that it was with a guy. She had a common sense talk with me and every time I've seen her over the past 15 years she has asked if I felt I should be tested. She's a great doctor.

[SuckerMC]

Great topic, Sucker! I think it's a great question and I hope there are responses that reflect that you guys are telling your doctors that you have had m/m sex.
Your Doctor is your doctor so why wouldn't you tell him?
If you're afraid he will judge you, then find a new doctor. Ditto if you're afraid he'll tell someone.
He's your doctor and therefore you are basically trusting him with your life. You'll go to him for sore throats, gout and skin rashes, right? No problem with the run of the mill stuff, right? What will you do that dreaded morning if you wake up with a chlamydial or gonococcal infection all over your bum? You'll need medicine, fellas and if your doctor already knows about your sexual habits then the trip to his office is going to be a lot less humiliating and the medicine not nearly as bitter.
Hubbys doctor knows. My doctor knows. We'd never wager our health over 45 seconds worth of mildly awkward conversation.

It's a topic I haven't seen talked about on here. With the bisexual lifestyle being a secret lifestyle I don't imagine a lot of people talk about it with their doctors unless they feel they need to. When does one talk about it? After the first time he sucked his first cock? After she had he first lesbian experience? Does this topic only apply to the bisexual lifestyle?

[playful808]

We live in a progressive city within a progressive state.
We play with a few friends, I am openly bi, no secrets.
We have the same primary care provider.
Our doctors know everything, and are supportive, if a little unfamiliar.
Our needs are different than those of a sexually exclusive couple.

We have never gotten any 'moral friction' from our providers.
No one wants to lose a career over something so dumb.

[sysper]

We have never gotten any 'moral friction' from our providers.
No one wants to lose a career over something so dumb.
wanna bet?
i'm not saying i disagree with ur attitude. but there are those out there who would rather judge & hate than heal. with the shit that's coming out of the federal government these days, those kinds of "doctors" are getting more empowered.

[bithunder]

I stand with sdbrit. I think that if he wanted your opinion on his guns or sex life he would have asked you for it.

[playful808]

wanna bet?
i'm not saying i disagree with ur attitude. but there are those out there who would rather judge & hate than heal. with the shit that's coming out of the federal government these days, those kinds of "doctors" are getting more empowered.

Yes, there are evil people in healthcare, but fewer than in the general population.
I grew up in small town upstate New York. I know how people can be.
And I am watching the 'religious liberty' nonsense unfold in the news.
Sometimes, in conservative places, progress is made one funeral at a time.

But. I have also worked in healthcare for years, on several levels.
Management (for larger employers), is always terrified of lawsuits.
Be it malpractice, medicare fraud, HIPPA issues, sexual harassment, whatever, ... anything that opens them to legal liability is taboo.
A single employee refusing treatment for reasons of 'religious liberty', is a magnet for lawsuits.
Years of terrible publicity, huge legal fees, and for nothing. A 'lose-lose' proposition for the institution.
Very likely career ending for the healthcare provider too.

A small, private practice can be completely shut down with just one lawsuit.
And a special class of lawyers are willing to help it happen, for about 35% of damages.

My 2 cents.

[sysper]

i'll take ur word for it. but it also makes sense the way u put it. alot of people live in the fear of being sued. whether justified or not. so i can see how doctors wanna avoid being "controversial."
but i'm scared the more doctors dare to be "controversial" & the more radical governments support them, the more this bullshit becomes more normalized. probably won't happen in the big cities, but i could see this happening in smaller ones where the love of god justifies the hate of faggots.

[foundpuppy]

My urologist is female and the questionaire I had to fill out prior to my appointment asked if I had sex with men. i answered in the affirmative and I guess she read it but never mentioned it. But I will say she is quite friendly to me.

[wifekinky4husband]

Our doctor is the doctor who took care of us in college. She was one of the college doctors. New, young, hot as heck. My husband had the biggest crush on her and of course had the hots for her body - which was smoking (still is), even under all the doctor garb. Over time we all moved near the same area after college. My husband had always been upfront about his sexual activity with her from the get go.

She us very professional to this day and knows every little thing about us sexually. She has been and still is very concerned about the unprotected anal sex and other unprotected sex. We are as careful as we can be, trusting our partners are as honest with us as we are with them. I supposed it’s the best we can do. I wish we didn’t have to be concerned with such things; it’d certainly make for a lot more open fun. I think we have pushed the envelope as far we can tough.

When I told out doctor of where I was heading with anal sex on my husband she tried to not show shock which somehow appeared as Wow now That’s interesting. She did her medical spiel. On the weekend she called to meet for lunch. She had so many questions. So off the doc clock she is very into it all, thinks it very retro/metro/modern or something like that and wants us to enjoy it. On the doc clock she is always concerned medically and wants us to be safe and wise.

[querty]

My Doctor is simply fantastic. He knows it all, and I wouldn't have it any other way. If he doesnt know everything about my sexual practices and preferences, how is he supposed to treat my physical and mental health to the best of his abilities?

He always ask about my lifestyle, if I am starting anything new (like anal), new partners, about my wife and her hhealth and activities. He gives me lots of great guidance

[csreef]

Our doctor is the doctor who took care of us in college. She was one of the college doctors. New, young, hot as heck. My husband had the biggest crush on her and of course had the hots for her body - which was smoking (still is), even under all the doctor garb. Over time we all moved near the same area after college. My husband had always been upfront about his sexual activity with her from the get go.

She us very professional to this day and knows every little thing about us sexually. She has been and still is very concerned about the unprotected anal sex and other unprotected sex. We are as careful as we can be, trusting our partners are as honest with us as we are with them. I supposed it’s the best we can do. I wish we didn’t have to be concerned with such things; it’d certainly make for a lot more open fun. I think we have pushed the envelope as far we can tough.

When I told out doctor of where I was heading with anal sex on my husband she tried to not show shock which somehow appeared as Wow now That’s interesting. She did her medical spiel. On the weekend she called to meet for lunch. She had so many questions. So off the doc clock she is very into it all, thinks it very retro/metro/modern or something like that and wants us to enjoy it. On the doc clock she is always concerned medically and wants us to be safe and wise.

Maybe I'm "reading into this" a little too much, but I think your Doctor may be interested in exploring her sexuality with you two. :2cents: worth.

[Neonaught]

Maybe I'm "reading into this" a little too much, but I think your Doctor may be interested in exploring her sexuality with you two. :2cents: worth.

You may be correct but as long as she is there Doctor that would be unethical. They would have to find a new doctor before it would be acceptable.

[csreef]

You may be correct but as long as she is there Doctor that would be unethical. They would have to find a new doctor before it would be acceptable.

Thank you for pointing this out.

[Jazminedress]

Just had two days with my doctor and some tests, with one of them being the fun one adults get in that area, not one question about anything

[DD788Snipe]

sdbrit is correct lancer and since you nolonger live in our state it is you that doesn't have a clue.
Sorry I don't usually get political but had to say something. My doc is clueless and I plan on keeping him that way due to the fact he's my wife's doc also.

[SuckerMC]

Do you include telling your oral hygienist also?

[yeahso]

Unless it is a need to know, I do not tell any of my healthcare professionals about my sexuality or sexual activity.

[Nagisa]

Everything depends on the doctor, because I know that there are bisexual doctors as well so it is pretty comfortable to know such people. In general, sometimes I can't tell a doctor that I'm a bi because of their ages, but most of them knows about my sexual life. I think it would be nice to find doctors on this forum and go only to their clinique. There is one more idea which I consider really cool. There are new practice management software (https://www.iinsight.biz/) created by developers. There can be mentioned smth about each patient's sexual life, so the doctors can chose us.

[rukiddingme]

If you get and endoscopy, your doctor and everyone in that room including the office staff will know.
Well if you had anal or if you play with dildos.

What???, I'm scheduled. Hopefully the staff is not anyone I know

[nu2curious]

Medical information is not as private as many would think therefore say only what you wish to say, once out there it's not retrievable by any means.

[BackyardShaman]

No, I’ve never discussed that with any Doctors, however I’ve been examined by a male doctor that was obviously bisexual or gay in the way I was touched, both when examining my penis and balls and especially the rectal exam which was very intense. He had a huge finger and eased his thumb in too, and yes I looked over my shoulder it was his hand, but it felt like a dick and basically was a finger fuck after his feel of my prostate.

[friesbaconnekkid]

I'm from a small conservative town, and have known my doctor for years. I finally came out to him a couple years ago. It didn't seem to bother him at all. He did ask me what kind of sexual activity I was involved in, which is a very legitimate question.
I told him I suck off a lot of guys, and some of them fuck me. He asked if we used protection? I told him no, it's not enjoyable giving a blow job or taking a cock in your ass with rubber between the cock and skin. I also told him if a guy wears a condom for a blowjob, it's hard to tell when he is completely done giving his seed. As far as being fucked goes, I know it feels better for the guy fucking me to not use a condom.
Doc went through the recommended safety talk. I told him it was doubtful if i changed my ways, as enjoying the semen is a big part of the sex.
He told me that STD's are very rare in our area, and I should be okay doing it, but if traveling out of the area, be sure to be tested when i got back home.