Bi or Gay

[charman]

Howard Stern stated one time that if you are bi you are gay. I consider myself to be bi not gay. I just love sex, rather it is with a female or male or both at the same time.

What does everyone else think?

[marine20]

howard stern is not the genius of the ages. i'm bi , not gay . like you, i love women not men . i do however have sex with men on occasion . that does not make me gay. in simple terms , if you have sex with both genders , you are bisexual , period !

[JeffT]

I'm bisexual. I'm not gay. I enjoy sex with women and men. That's what bisexual means, regardless of what Mr. Stern appears to believe.

[Just Taste It]

I’m bi, I love sex with both males and females but prefer women

[cornholejoe]

Bi and now days mostly have sex with women

[John1971]

I'm bi-curious, not gay. I want to be fucked more than I want to suck cock, but have no interest in a romantic relationship with a man.

[Jozyxt]

Maybe heteroflexible or maybe bi. I haven't really ever gotten into sex with men beyond cocksucking. The few times I've played with more doing more for guys it has been physically bland and emotionally disconnected role play at the request of a partner.

I recently reconnected with a guy that has sucked me several times and gave me the best orgasm I'd had in years after an long P-spot massage. This time I want to be active, rather than passively letting him please me, and see if I can find a way to be more emotionally involved in the sex. He has a great cock but never cums for me or even seems to be interested. So my goal is to take my time and get him horny enough to make him cum in my mouth. I think this will require some emotional involvement that can't be faked. So we will see what happens.

Anyway, I want to want to have a deeper connection with the men I have sex with and be truly bi.

[void()]

Howard, who? ...

Enjoy sex with men, women, transitioning. Consider myself bisexual. Not overly concerned with the opinions of others having any say in defining me. We're all different anyway. What does it matter as long as we're good people?

[Veryoralniceguy]

I’m definitely Bi, I love sex with both men and women. Nothing like eating a wet juicy pussy and sucking the cum out of a cock.

[ScottSwallows]

I’m bisexual.
I enjoy eating and fucking pussy.
I also enjoy sucking cock and getting fucked up the ass.
I enjoy both sexes equally.

[tongueteaser]

I would call myself BiCurious. I just love all sex with a woman and attracted to them. Not so with a man. I just love the cock down there and dont care about the rest of him

[JohnnyBisexual]

I am Bisexual and Heteroromantic, regardless of what Howard Stern says. I love to suck cocks, but I also love to eat and fuck pussy. He’s just talking out of his ass.

[Long Duck Dong]

I get what they are saying, in a sense.......as in bi can have a gay and straight side, kinda like having romantic and sexual connection with women /men but only a sexual desire for men / women ( not true of all bi people) within the spectrum of being bi....

Bi is an attraction and desire that differs from person to person,and I remember previous debates in this site about how if a person is having separate sexual encounters with males and with females, that its bi sex because the person is bisexual.....yet sexual acts are defined as straight and gay / lesbian regardless of the sexuality of the person, for the most part.......

[tenni]

Ah yes LDD.

Bisexuality is an attraction, (physical and or emotional) to both men and women. You only have to have been attracted. You do not have to have sex with men and women to consider yourself bisexual.

The only people that have "gay" sex are those who identify as gay. If two same sexed people have sex and one is identifying as bisexual and the other is a gay person they are having same sex activity not gay sex. (can be confusing)

Since bisexuals tend to be "fluid" in their attractions more than straight or gay people people like Stern get confused. Add to this a person calling themselves bisexual but later identifying as gay adds confusion. A bisexual may enter a monogamous relationship with a gay person but identify as bisexual not gay. Some bisexuals in long term same sext relationships are offended if the "gay" label is forced on them.

Bisexuals may or may not get involved with another person in what is often seen as gay activity ( ie. cock sucking, anal penetration)

Some men identify as bisexual but state that they do not feel emotionally attracted to other men....but later may find the emotional attraction develops for same sex partners. Fluid again over time.

Pansexuals throw the fluidity button wide open and may find themselves attracted to all genders including transgender.

[darkeyes]

Ah yes LDD.



The only people that have "gay" sex are those who identify as gay. If two same sexed people have sex and one is identifying as bisexual and the other is a gay person they are having same sex activity not gay sex. (can be confusing)
I am able to agree with most of what you said, Tenni, me old luff, but this bit is a lorra of ole tosh. Take it from me, of all the same sex nookie I've had with bisexual women over me life is certainly lesbian sex. Even if I was a bisexual woman, it was and always will be lesbian (homosexual) sex whether you like it or not.

Merry Crimbo u ole coot. Hope yas had a rare ole time. An' Happy New Year and it comes!!!

[KDaddy23]

I don't know why anyone would take anything Howard says seriously and more so when he let his ignorance show with that idiotic statement. He, like a lot of people, thinks that the sexual act defines the person - and it doesn't. It's why I say that I'm not straight but I'm not gay and the only time I am is when I'm doing something gay, like sucking dick, etc.. Howard Sterns is about causing a ruckus and getting people's dander up. Sometimes, he says shit that makes sense... but this one? A lot of people don't know the difference and that should tell you more about them than it says anything about you being bi... and what it should tell you is pretty sad to see how... stupid some people are.

[Rest85]

I like Howard Stern. I didn't for a long time but then I've heard him being humble on talk shows and I have grown to like him. However, he isn't necessarily an expert on matters sexual.
I never understood why it's so difficult for people to understand that bisexual is just what is says. Bi...sexual. We like sex with either men or women. My interpretation of what being gay is, is when guys want a relationship with other guys. They have emotional feelings for other guys...they kiss, cuddle, etc etc.
Still there is a sexual spectrum and I'm sure there are gay guys who can desire sex with women also. But, to me, being bisexual means desiring sex with men or women but not being emotionally attached to the same sex. I love to suck cock but I don't want to kiss or cuddle or have a emotional relationship with a man. I am on the spectrum where I only desire sucking cock...no anal, etc.

Others may differ about the details. I am not gay. I consider myself bisexual.

[Rest85]

I don't know why anyone would take anything Howard says seriously and more so when he let his ignorance show with that idiotic statement. He, like a lot of people, thinks that the sexual act defines the person - and it doesn't. It's why I say that I'm not straight but I'm not gay and the only time I am is when I'm doing something gay, like sucking dick, etc.. Howard Sterns is about causing a ruckus and getting people's dander up. Sometimes, he says shit that makes sense... but this one? A lot of people don't know the difference and that should tell you more about them than it says anything about you being bi... and what it should tell you is pretty sad to see how... stupid some people are.

Very nicely put. "He, like a lot of people, think that the sexual act defines the person - and it doesn't" So true! So many people, when they hear about someone being gay, they are disgusted because they think of sexual acts between men. Stupid (my opinion). When a m/f couple is introduced to those same people, they don't automatically think of what they do in bed. Well, maybe they do...lol. But that doesn't define the person. Very nice post, KDaddy!

[KDaddy23]

"My interpretation of what being gay is, is when guys want a relationship with other guys. They have emotional feelings for other guys...they kiss, cuddle, etc etc."

Well, yeah... and not really. Wanting a relationship isn't, in my opinion, a defining point as far as being gay is since I've slept with a lot of gay men who weren't even interested in a relationship... and not all of them were into kissing and cuddling, etc., etc. Being gay is... a state of mind. Being totally about men whether it's sexually, emotionally, or both. The sex two men can have is gay - it's homosexual sex - and it is what it is but it's still not what one does that defines being gay - it's how they see themselves more than anything else. Having that affinity for men only. Being gay is what you normally do in the majority of time or your default behavior and a default that some guys aren't of a mind to deviate from - but yeah, some gay guys have sex with women and will tell you that they're still gay - because that's how they think of themselves.

Being bisexual means being attracted physically (sexually), emotionally, or both to men and women. Whether one chooses not to be emotionally attached to someone is their personal preference and a lot of bi guys would be happy to not get emotionally attached. This is the point where, when we're talking about this, we have to be able to take a big step back from our own idea of these things and look at it as it really is. Bi guys aren't gay guys. Duh. Sexuality is fluid but we are also creatures of habit; we get to a place and we stay there unless something changes. Guys go from straight to bi - nothing unusual in this and it's usually for the sex more than seeking a more emotional attachment and being in a relationship sure as fuck does not - and cannot - define bisexuality. We also assume that, say, if a guy is gay, there's no way he's going to not be gay and some gay men believe that they can't change... but that's because they really don't understand how this can really work.

We create our own opinions and impressions about this - and there's nothing wrong with that. Being straight means one thing; being bi means something else and being gay means yet something else. What gets lost in such discussions is that regardless to one's sexuality, we all go about having sex the same way and for a lot of the same reasons - and that also includes wanting to be emotionally attached and being in a relationship. Now it's just a matter of how you think you should be going about these very social and human things and who you prefer to do them with. Not so much what you do but why you're doing it. Don't get it twisted - bi guys, when they're not having gay sex, are also straight guys. How they have sex is irrelevant and relationships don't have shit to do with it.

And I know and have been with bi guys who want a relationship, and they love to kiss and cuddle, too... and I know that it doesn't make or mean that they're gay and even more so when I know they're going to leave me... and get into having sex with a woman if they got it like that and, you betcha, I'm going to be doing the same thing because, um, I'm bi. Not men or women: Men and women and relationships are optional. I was in a relationship with a gay man... and I wasn't gay. All it really meant was that the guy I was in a relationship with was gay. We kissed and cuddled... and he was still gay and I was still bi. We just gotta be clear about this... because there are people like Howard Sterns who are totally clueless about these things and prone to saying... stupid shit and they'd love for us to buy into their idiotic beliefs. Personal opinions are fine... but be able to see it all as it really is and that sexuality doesn't really have anything to do with what's really going on. Sex. With or without emotional attachment and with or without a relationship. Kissing and cuddling or none of the above and per one's preferences.

Not trying to rain on anyone's parade.

[nu2curious]

Howard Stern has gotten quite wealthy making outrageous statements always with his bold ''in your face" style so whatever he says it simply doesn't matter . There's a huge difference between Bi and Gay just the the definition of the two words alone should suffice .

[ClassicPaCpl]

Personally I dont care what anyone says or thinks.. Its my body, my lifestyle choice and my desires.. SO if I wish to say I am gay fine, If I wish to say I am BI great!!
I am TOTALLY" BI" by the way ;)
That being said... The reason I am BI is because I love women, BUT Crave men! Meaning... I think women are a gift from god.. They are beautiful and I cherish the hell out of a women.
I want to kiss them, Hug them, admire them, and I love to bath in their beauty. I dont care if they are big or small, heavy or thin, or older or younger... I do draw the line on younger.. Not a ped!!! teens just dont turn me on period!
Men on the other hand.. All I care about is their cock... I dont want to kiss them, I dont get all dreamy thinking of them. I just want to suck their cocks and get taken up the WHOHA!
So no matter what anyone else says... Im NOT gay... Im Bisexual
Hope that made sense and I didnt piss anyone off

[BigAlNYC]

I knew Howard a bit way back when he was working in Michigan, and thought he was a glib and engaging but obnoxious jerk back then. One who was not as smart or insightful as his conceit made him think that he was. From what I've heard from him over the years not all that much has changed, and I certainly can't imagine letting anything he thinks about people or the world affect my perceptions of the world or myself in any way.

I am bisexual, in that I have and enjoy sexual relations with both women and men. I have known, respected, and loved (platonically and sometimes otherwise) many gay people during my life, but I am not one of them. I have been primarily heterosexual throughout my life, but I have also had plenty of same-sex sexual interactions. These have ranged from very brief assignations to, yes, full kiss and cuddle type relationships. In coming to know myself and my own particular sexuality and sexual and relationship tastes I have come to recognize that, although we as a society like to order these things as being a limited either/or type categorization, in reality there is a nearly infinite variety of tastes and inclinations, and that these things can actually be quite fluid throughout our lifetimes.

[csreef]

I am Bisexual. I enjoy sex with both men and women... When I became comfortable in my sexuality, I felt more balanced in my life. Also my problem solving skills and creativity skyrocketed! My one regret is that i waited 15 years to explore my sexual curiosity.

[Jazminedress]

Howard Stern stated one time that if you are bi you are gay. I consider myself to be bi not gay. I just love sex, rather it is with a female or male or both at the same time.

What does everyone else think?

Well, Howard Stern is a twat waffle................yes, if I am with a guy, I am having gay sex, but being bi does NOT mean I am gay. Its a standard BS answer that people who dont believe people can be Bi give

[SlowNEZ]

My 2 cents:
Bi guys are particularly attracted to the male anatomy, whereas gay guys are primarily attracted to the guy himself.
Abridged version: Bi guys want cock. Gay guys want a relationship.

[darkeyes]

My 2 cents:
Bi guys are particularly attracted to the male anatomy, whereas gay guys are primarily attracted to the guy himself.
Abridged version: Bi guys want cock. Gay guys want a relationship.Some bisexuals, guys or women, want a relationship.. Some gays, guys or gels don't. As a gay woman I've had relationships with my own gender to one degree of other, and I've had sex with my own gender on the most casual basis.

When I considered myself a bisexual woman, I had relationships with both men and women, even marrying one particularly lovely man, but had sex with members of both genders on a much more casual basis.

KDaddy is closest to the truth of it. No matter our sexuality we may or may not want relationships, we may or may not solely be interested in the anatomy of other people of whatever gender, but many of us fall for those we get off and have sex with and we call that love. Many human beings, arguably most of all genders, and all specialities are liable to do that.

[Cdnbi]

Bisexual is for sure different. I have no desire to have a relationship with a man but sexually I’m open to sex with either gender. Pretty plain and simple if you ask me.

[KDaddy23]

We keep making differences about all of this when we probably shouldn't. Not all gay men want a relationship - they want the sex and thank you very much for it. I've been pondering why relationships are being heralded as a defining factor in bisexuality and I think I know why and the reason is that no matter what your sexual preferences are, we all want the same things whether it's just sex or more than that. We need to step away from the tired-assed stereotypes that I grew up with, like, all gay men want you to be their boyfriend and have a relationship with you. The truth is not all of them do. We need to revise our thinking about bi men refusing to be in a relationship with a guy when it's clear that some guys very much want to... and they're not gay.

If nothing else - and if there is any real difference between bi and gay - it's... preference. What you want to do versus what you don't want to do. The ever-present quandary one can run into when someone - and regardless to sexuality - just wants to have sex but the other person wants a relationship... because our morality says and implies that the only acceptable sex is... relationship sex. Not committing the sin of fornication and having sex without being in a relationship... and something we've all been guilty of at some point in our lives. I get it. Playing by the rules but not really playing by them. If it's not a problem for a guy, getting some dick is what the doctor ordered and no matter if you're gay or bi. If getting some dick in a more... stable situation - like being in a relationship - is what makes you all nice and happy, being bi or gay really has nothing to do with it. We just feel... better about the relationship part but keep getting it twisted to keep thinking that gay guys want a relationship. I've been with too many who just preferred not to go there - let's just fuck or whatever and let it go at that. I've been with some who have gotten totally pissed off because I wasn't interested in giving them the relationship they wanted... and something that, again, regardless to sexuality, we want in our lives. Or we don't. Some people just don't have what it takes to be in a relationship... but they have no problems getting the dick - and they shouldn't have any problems.

That's more of a human thing than a sexuality thing. I've been in a relationship with a very gay guy. It was amazing. Taught me some important shit. Have had sex with many a man who did not want to be bothered with anything that looked like it might turn into a relationship. Fine. It's about getting some dick and having fun with it and if we wanna do it more often, let's talk about it... but we're not going to be boyfriends or whatever. And gay men have told me this. So much for "they all want a relationship." Let's just get naked and have sex. That always works... unless you believe you need a relationship to validate and justify your need to get some dick. Hmm. Not saying that's a bad thing; it just never was "the thing that had to be done" before sex could happen and being bi or gay only has meaning if the person believes it does and it should. Otherwise, there are no real differences since, at the root, bi or gay, we want the dick and in whatever way we want and need it. With or without a relationship.

Just me being real about it. Your thoughts and opinions will most definitely differ. And Howard Sterns was still an asshole for say what he did.

[tenni]

I agree with dark eyes and K Daddy. I remember that the definition of bisexual is fairly broad. It mentions that it is an attraction to both men and women, emotionally and/ or physically.

Many men lately posting on this site ignore the possibility that they may attract another man emotionally as well as physically. It may be that they are experiencing Biphobia directed to themselves. Self loathing that blocks acceptance of other men as more than fuck buds emotionally. Phobia that they might be gay and that real men hold back on the emotional angle. Biguys find it much easier to direct their emotional attraction just to women. Fear that they might be gay if they open the possibility of any emotional attraction to other men.

Biguys may see other men as fuck bud or one night stands. If a bi guy holds his emotional expressions beyond dick on another man he may develop as more of a mature bisexual perspective. A bi guy may be attracted to women more than men at one point in his life and then switch his attraction to other me . It is also possible that a bi guy may be attracted beyond his dick as a primary source of sexual intimacy. Kissing for a bi guy may be avoided as too intimate to expose himself as wanting that. Professing his attractions at least to himself can be rewarding but it seems difficult.

Monsexuals (heterosexual or gay) do not have as much complexity to deal with as bisexuals seem to have.