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querty
May 16, 2023, 5:01 PM
Is there such a thing as gay sex?


Over the years I have had a few fuck buddy dudes, either as part of a couple of one on one sorta thing. The 'Bi sex' was (mostly) good, and fun, and erotic, especially since it wasn't that often, so it was more of a kinky 'event' on the down low. Last year or so ago, I reconnected with the guy half of a couple from our swinger days. The wife and I had never played with them as a couple (too bad to cause his wife is really sexy). Somehow through another Swinger Girl Friend I learned that he was Bi Curious with just a little experience. I forget the details of how we got in touch, but we did and we went for it. He was nervous about it cause it was his first 1:1 with a guy (not mine though). It was a fun experience for us both and we agreed to get together again as soon as we could. It's a little difficult because his wife doesn't know he is Bi, and my wife knows I am but doesn't like it and doesn't want to hear about it. My journey with the wife and the growth of my Bi side is for another post, probably longer than this one.


Anyway, we have gotten together three or four times now, I'll skip the first two as they were explorative for us both. Before, it was as I said above fun and erotic (I love giving head), but it was still a bit reserved on his part and he struggled with staying hard. There wasn't passion connected with it, not alot of body contact, no kissing. But... the last two times, holy shit. Unlike any sex I've had with a guy before.


So about two months ago we get together for I think our 3rd time and it was GOOD sex. Passionate, relaxed, go with the flow. We experimented with kissing (he had never kissed a guy before). Lots of oral and I topped him beautifully, so he said over and over. Now I have topped guys before, but it was just something to do that was more like returning the favor. But this time, I was fucking him in a much different way, MUCH more like I would fuck a woman. Were we making love? .......No. I make love to my wife and my GF. With women other than my wife it's more than just sex, but it's not making love.


So then we got together again last weekend, and blew the roof off of it. Lots of body contact, running our hands over each other (we are both very fit), the oral sex was passionate, the fucking was passionate, we were both relaxed. We took short breaks and chatted. Some of it might have been the jean skirt I was wearing, or the black mini dress (he loves that). :)


On the ride home I thought to myself, Man o Man that was amazing gay sex! And then I thought, why does it need to be categorized as Gay Sex, and not just Great Sex. Why must I frame it up around the gender of the person I had sex with. I'm not commenting on doing away with pronouns, stripping away gender identifciation, etc etc. or any of that. But, do I need to differentiate?


So did I have Gay Sex, or just great sex. When my wife and I get together, does it have to be "Straight Sex", or just great sex, or passionate sex, etc.


Anyway, there you have it.

Tight1-4u
May 16, 2023, 5:23 PM
There you have it!!! Yes yes yes I love it.. you hit the nail squarely on the head.. I have ask myself this very same question for a while now.. I for one feel and believe that great sex is just that great sex,, no matter who you have it with..
The fact of the matter is that 80% of the world don?t understand that we can and do enjoy sex with both sex?s.. it is unattractive to them.. now that dose not make either side right.. we are just different.. even from gay?s were different.. but yes I believe that great sex is just that great sex.. enjoy it bask in it!!

KDaddy23
May 16, 2023, 5:51 PM
"Gay sex" is... how gay people have sex and it got separated from "straight sex" because... we do shit like this. It's really... sex, right? Doesn't really matter what sex your partner is but, again, we like to make differences when there are no real differences. Yeah, like straight people really do have sex differently from everyone else? One day back in the wild and sex-crazy days of my youth, I'm having sex with a guy and realized that I was doing the same things with him as I'd done, coincidentally, with his sister the day before. Did all the foreplay stuff with both of them and screwed both of them in their ass - she didn't want any evidence that she was sexually active - and my mind said, "Hmm... it's not really that different..."

But we refer to what we do with men as gay sex... because it's the exact same ways that gay men can have sex. Two bi women doing each other are having... lesbian sex even though neither of them is a lesbian. You see, friends, we should be more careful with the words we use because they have great power...

Long Duck Dong
May 16, 2023, 11:17 PM
Honestly we use many terms, such as gay sex, bi sex, lesbian sex.....but ironically we do not define what that sex is.....


I tend to side with Kdaddy, as you have just noticed......people will often define the type of sex, based around the gender of the person, not the sexual orientation of the person, and yes its how we end up with saying gay sex even tho you are both bi......

I have a intersex female partner, she was born with a cock and a pussy, both work.... and also while I refer to her as female, she does not call herself female, she considers herself to be non binary...so if I fuck her pussy, that could be called straight sex but when she fucks me anally with her cock, is that gay sex????

Some have tried to say its straight sex then realise that they consider anal sex to be seperate from straight sex ( cock and pussy ) or try to say its gay sex but I am a guy, my partner is not.
Finally most people just give up because they can not answer it....

Now the issue of bi sex has been debated in this site before.......and some had the stance that bisexual sex is sex with a male and female..... well using that stance I could have bisexual sex with a guy tonight, a female tomorrow and my partner the night after, and thats bisexual sex........
So what is it when I am being fucked by a male while fucking a female, at the same time ? call it bisexual sex..... and that makes it different to having seperate sex with other people and saying its bisexual sex......

I could use the argument that I am bisexual therefore the sex I have is bisexual, be it a threesome with a male and female at the same time as well as sex with them seperately on different nights.......but that would mess with the idea that I am having gay sex with a male and straight sex with the female

so I tend to use the stance, that its just sex, enjoyable sex......and the only people that may care about what type of sex is it, is other people......

tenni
May 16, 2023, 11:58 PM
The way that I look at this is to focus on "Bisexual". Bisexual is to be attracted to more genders than we think usually.

I like the term "same sex" . It leaves the door open for the attraction to be physical, emotional. Gay term refers to only one gender and bisexuals have more than one gender attraction. It can get you down trying to think through these sexualities(straight, bisexual, gay etc.

querty
May 17, 2023, 10:54 AM
Thanks all for the commentary! I guess the best thing is, we need not define the 'type' of sex in any one way but our own, if at all.

KDaddy23
May 17, 2023, 2:22 PM
The problem is that we have to call something... something. Bisexuals, as usual, fuck up the accepted nomenclature because we can indulge in both straight and gay sex but, yeah, is there such a thing as bisexual sex? And does that mean having sex with a man and a woman at the same time? You tell me since a lot of bisexuals never get to have this experience! Someone says to me, "Ew... you have gay sex!" and I reply, "No, I have sex and I'm not picky about it being with a dude or a babe." The look on their face was precious and put their confusion on display because... there's no word for how bisexuals have sex... and maybe "bisexual sex" does work even if it's... clumsy. Heh, heh, maybe we can call it "stray sex," and combining the words "straight" and "gay!" Big time sigh because when I'm having sex with a guy, I'm... having sex. I know what people call it and I'm okay with it. Ditto when I've got a woman face down/ass up and giving her da bizness; I'm having sex... and I know what people call that, too. Bisexuals, again, fuck all of up because we can have sex both ways. Someone else asks, "How can you have gay sex... but you're not gay?"

People... you just gotta love 'em sometimes, bless their heart...

cornholejoe
May 17, 2023, 9:23 PM
to me its just great sex dont matter man or women its still sex

bobby63114
May 18, 2023, 12:44 AM
warm hole is a warm hole and a warm mouth is a warm mouth, gender makes no difference.