Bisexuality Doesn't Exist

[Promising Galahad]

I use to post on a gay message board that had a decent bisexual section til I realized the moderators pretty much hate bisexual guys. I got into a debate that got pretty ugly with a poster who was also bi who said we should be quiet about our bisexuality,its nothing to be proud of,we're all not really bi, and so on.Anyway, I saw this and it made my blood boil. I can't reply because I'll probably get banned from that board(they don't like it when you disagree with them) Anyway, I just needed to vent and share this crap.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Interesting Topic for sure.
I've Heard/Read/Experienced that Men are not actually capable of being Bisexual. that if one believes they are bisexual they are either 1) Unsure of their orientation so decides to choose the either-way way. or 2) is sexually promiscuous and basically has an urge to have sexual relations with either sexes.

But apparently not actually be Bi.

Now personally i believe this, because once upon a time i was "Bi" and now i'm obviously full fledged Gay. and i've had guys tell me they're bi and i think to myself "just give it some time" and a week or two weeks or a couple months later i learn that they are infact Fully Gay. or Fully Straight. But NEVER Bi.

Now i'm sure there are people out there who are bi and/or think they are bi. and just wondering what you have to say. Remember this is just a study i read a while back (or saw it on tv i don't remember it was a long time ago.) so it's not just me going off on a tangent.

Is this true? are there some gay guys out there that once upon time thought you were gay? lemme know. and any other experiences you have had relating to this topic.

If you head over and post be warned,its not a very bifriendly place to post.

http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=191600

[the mage]

CRAP...

Hers another take on it..
We Bi's are quite real thankyou,
The one's who decide to join one side or the other exclusively are the ones who are "settling" for the "norm".

Its tough being bi as you all know. Its difficult to nurture relationships with both sexes..its tough to fight the constant judgment regarding monogamy and love and play.

Theres usually a "preferred" sexual activity. Once found with a partner its easier to just get the most of the best type of sex/love combo you like in a partnership. VERY few people are able to have open relationships, so people choose.

[Promising Galahad]

I agree. I'm debating on wheather or not I should collect some responses and then head over and post them all as a response. I love the gay community and know this is not how all gay people feel. However, I hate how a gay man who can;t possible understand how I think can summ me up and my likes and what I am attracted to so easily. Lets see a Right Wing Christain tell a gay man its a choice and they really aren;t gay and see how long that Shit flies!

[The Barefoot Contess]

For a list of biphobic behavior "symptoms", check out this link:http://www.biresource.org/pamphlets/biphobia.html
I am sure we have all heard, and even perhaps accepted, some of that crap in our lives. Nowadays, if I hear such remarks, I usually try to explain my point (without necessarily outing myself to people I don't care about --- although of course they will assume I am bisexual simply because I am able to explain bisexuality), but I don't go out of my way to argue with people with no intention of accepting a challenge. It is a waste of time, and it drains you unnecessarily.

[Promising Galahad]

I've posted these reposnes on the message board and am being warned that I am starting trouble.Biphobia DOES exist!

[HiBiGuy]

I've posted these reposnes on the message board and am being warned that I am starting trouble.Biphobia DOES exist!

Maybe we should all join and flood their boards with bi information.
Bwaahaaahaaaa (evil, maniacal laugh) :bigrin:

[Promising Galahad]

I got a message saying I was an instigator. I asked the moderator that warned me what I did wrong. I posted on the "Bisexual Section" of the gay message board. WHat would have happened if I posted a topic saying"Homosexuality Doesn't exist"? I would have so many negatove comments my head would spin. This is my problem having biphobic gay moderators on a bisexual discussion of a gay message board.Double standards.All I was doing is giving "my opinion" an alternative version of the original posters comments. Yet it I who was warned. Heres what the moderator wrote.

"Ok.I know that you are upset by what the OP has said, and I can certainly understand why. It is nobody's place to tell you what you are, that decision is yours and yours alone. That is the very purpose of this forum, and one that we will defend and enforce without hesitation.

However, I have very carefully read this thread, and the OP has raised a question that is certainly volatile, but he has said nothing accusatory or malicious. He has asked a question, and like any other poster, if he asks a pertinent question within the boundaries of what is acceptable in these forums, he deserves the same consideration as any other member.

If this conversation degenerates into attacks and criticism, we will shut it down. However, there is no need for that to happen based on the OP, so lets take a moment, collect ourselves, and address the question on the table."

If the moderator understand why I am upset and I haven't broken any rules (swearing,throwing nasty insults,threatning,etc.)Why single me out?

[darkeyes]

Don give a sod wot sum gay peeps mite say..bisexuality is a reality an aint gonna disappear... personally think its prob the natural state of sexuality for human beins but has jus been crushed by millenia of persecution by bigotted arseholes who used it as an excuse 2 whip peeps wiv an gain power...1a many reasons...

Don matta if yas bi as part of a journey 2 ultimately becummin gay.. its wot happened 2 me...time me wos bi..me luffed an enjoyed me sex life wiv both sexes tyvm.. even married a lesser mortal cos me wanted 2 even tho me preference wos for gals.. but ya neva can tell jus who yas gonna fall in luv wiv.. didn last but lotsa marriages don for millionsa reasons... wile me wos actin as a bi woman an enjoyin it...simply me wos bi at that time... sexuality can b fluid an is in lotsa peeps.. don make it ne less of a reality. Me partner will neva call erself gay cos she still has this odd lil hankerin for poor ole man...me ribs er mercilously bout it jus as she dus bout me dykiness... but she is a bisexual woman an for life of me cant eva c er makin the transition that me did meself... an no reason she shud... in me own case it has been an inexorable journey 2 wer me is now...a lesbian..an doubt if me sexuality is fluid enuff 2 eva consider the move back 2 bisexuality as a possibility.. hav neva eva thotta meself as str8 so don even thinka that......but reely...who can tell for sure..nowt certain in life cept the leavin of it...

Sum peeps bein bi is a permanent state..they r an will always b... fluidity of sexuality for them means at ne given moment in time they mite fancy a guy..or next min ..a gal...sum r likely 2 fall in fall in luff wiv either... or even both.. sum peeps r jus in it for the sex... ther r degrees of bisexuality..if ya enjoys it..an feels it..ya r it... an don eva let ne bugga tell ya different!!!

[FalconAngel]

If the moderator understand why I am upset and I haven't broken any rules (swearing,throwing nasty insults,threatning,etc.)Why single me out?

It's prejudice; plain and simple.

Clearly, if you didn't say anything to attack anyone and you were singled out, then you are being "beaten down" because you stood up with the truth rather than just going with the "bi-phobic" flow.
To those who say we don't exist, that makes you a target. You need to post on the boards and counter the disinformation with facts.
Post the links to all of the sites that you can find with the latest research and information on Bisexuality.
Explain to them that few things in life are as black and white as they think it is.......particularly when it comes to sexuality. Human beings are not that simple. Well, most of us aren't, at least.

This issue is reminiscent of the racial issues that came up during WWII.
At that time there was a very vocal group of racists that claimed "Niggers can't fly airplanes. They just aren't smart enough.".
That ignorant statement was proven to be quite wrong by the Tuskeegee Airmen, who were not quite as good as the movie made them out to be, but were still amongst the top 5 fighter units in the ETO during the war.

So don't bend to prejudice. Stand and fight. Gay and straight bi-phobic activists want to say we don't exist. Well, we are here, right in front of them saying we do exist.

I have been Bisexual my whole life; I have known what I was even before I knew what to call it. to make it clear, it has been nearly 40 years that I have known what I was and I have no intention of "picking a side" now or in the future.

Maybe that will clarify a few things for the Bi-phobic members of that forum.

[ziggybabie]

Ignorance will always exist from every group. Why would the LBGT community be exempt from human nature? Besides hating bisexuals, the stereotypical "Hollywood" gay males think being gay means acting a certain way, and are intolerant of masculine traits in other gay males, telling them they are basically "not being themselves" or something.

You have white conservative Christians who basically hate people with any other religious views, including very similar sects of Christianity. Then, you have white liberals who preach tolerance of minority religions, while overreacting to the slightest display of Christian faith. And pagans and atheists can often be just as bad as the Christians, with their superiority complexes. Being in the South, I've definitely heard rednecks talking shit about "niggers". I've also had family robbed by black racist "thugs". Men treating their women as property, femi-Nazis looking to jump on anything any male does and exaggerate it. Liberals hating conservatives or vice versa, with neither side realizing it's own sides flaws and the other side's points.

I know this went off on an unrelated rant, but all I'm saying is that no group of people in society are beyond ignorance. All groups are biased or bigoted in some way, shape or form. There are individuals who are open enough to challenge their own biases and be introspective, but they are much fewer and far between than those who like things "black and white".

Sorry if that wasn't worded perfectly. :2cents:

[The Barefoot Contess]

Ignorance will always exist from every group. Why would the LBGT community be exempt from human nature? Besides hating bisexuals, the stereotypical "Hollywood" gay males think being gay means acting a certain way, and are intolerant of masculine traits in other gay males, telling them they are basically "not being themselves" or something.

You have white conservative Christians who basically hate people with any other religious views, including very similar sects of Christianity. Then, you have white liberals who preach tolerance of minority religions, while overreacting to the slightest display of Christian faith. And pagans and atheists can often be just as bad as the Christians, with their superiority complexes. Being in the South, I've definitely heard rednecks talking shit about "niggers". I've also had family robbed by black racist "thugs". Men treating their women as property, femi-Nazis looking to jump on anything any male does and exaggerate it. Liberals hating conservatives or vice versa, with neither side realizing it's own sides flaws and the other side's points.

I know this went off on an unrelated rant, but all I'm saying is that no group of people in society are beyond ignorance. All groups are biased or bigoted in some way, shape or form. There are individuals who are open enough to challenge their own biases and be introspective, but they are much fewer and far between than those who like things "black and white".

Sorry if that wasn't worded perfectly. :2cents:

Very well put.

[Gemini25]

SO I went to the site to read for myself what the Biphobic people were posting. I didn't see anything inflamitory about what Promising Galahad had to say, and I'm still a little confused as to why "gay" men would go into a bisexual forum posting to insult us. There were some "Ex-Bisexual" people who are now gay and don't belive in bisexuality anymore. I guess being Bi served there purpose, and now there done with it. I don't get it. I had to become a member and make a post of my own which you can read below: :flag3:

Ex-Homosexual here. I know I'm a bit different then your regular garden variety Bisexual. But when I was a young teen figuring out who and what I was, I had very close people to me and very strong influences telling me that Homosexuality was wrong, and Bisexuallity didn't exist, and what I was feeling was wrong. I never felt completely hetrosexual, and I never felt completely homosexual. I got into a homosexual relationship although it was nice and loving, there was always something missing. What kept adding to my confusion and frustration was the attraction to both men and women. It took me a couple years to figure out that I am actually truely Bisexual. Having sex with a woman and a man both are exciting to me, I am equally atracked to both, and I like spending time with both. I now identify a Bisexual only and don't see that changing at all.

[Promising Galahad]

Hey thanks. I just posted a thank you Gemini25 . I recieved several PM's and apparently its been suggested that a bisexual should modeate the bisexual board but they will not allow it.I guess its a pretty common thing when it comes to bisexual threads. They resent the fact that they HAD TO create a bisexual forum because so many of the mebers were bi. What makes me angry is I have supported them finacially in the past.Alot of ex-Bisexual posts so I asked if a ex bi was like an ex-gay? Are the ex bi's on the board the Larry Craigs and Ted Haggert's? I'm sure I'll be banned for that. Anyway, thanks for the support. The hate and intolerance I have seen over there today is just sad.They didn't use to be that bad & thats the site where I first heard about bisexual.com.Anyway, thanks again for the support. I needed it today and meant alot. Thnaks all! :flag3:

[marriedbiguy4]

i am straight emotionally, but bi sexually. i love being intimate with my wife on a level that i would feel uncomfortable with a man. but i love cock as much as i do a woman, my nirvana being sharing a friend's erection with my wife knowing i'll soon have it in my ass while she sucks his balls. but after i like to cuddle up to her and talk.

[jem_is_bi]

I am 60 yrs old and have been sexually attracted to both men and women since I was old enough to understood what sex was about. I have always liked men more than women. But, I still like women.

JEM

[rider0660]

There are times when I am as straight as an arrow. I only want to have sex with women, but there are times when only playing with the guys will do. I have no idea why, nor do I care. I only know that there are strong sexual urges for both sexes at different times, and sometimes at the same time. Who am I to question such a tremendous desire? I don't; I go with it. And quite frankly, any one who doesnt like my choice of sexual partner can kiss my butt.

[the mage]

It is perfectly acceptable to be inflammatory, but you are not allowed to flame someone in return.

Check the history of posting here and other place and you'll see it.

People can type with impunity things which if said face to face would provoke an immediate violent response. Those things would not be said face to face by most rational people, that is what makes us "civilized' and able to get along.
The online world must always be remembered as only a partial glimpse at a section of a personality, yet that small revelation is often the most base and vile the real person has to offer. The type face is a ready outlet for ignorance, frustration and resentment and anger, just look at Craiglists "rants and raves section sometime.

Try not to judge the real world by the 1's and o's.
go out and experience the real world..

[DiamondDog]

It is perfectly acceptable to be inflammatory, but you are not allowed to flame someone in return.

Check the history of posting here and other place and you'll see it.

People can type with impunity things which if said face to face would provoke an immediate violent response. Those things would not be said face to face by most rational people, that is what makes us "civilized' and able to get along.
The online world must always be remembered as only a partial glimpse at a section of a personality, yet that small revelation is often the most base and vile the real person has to offer. The type face is a ready outlet for ignorance, frustration and resentment and anger, just look at Craiglists "rants and raves section sometime.

Try not to judge the real world by the 1's and o's.
go out and experience the real world..

:rolleyes: LMAO talk about being a hypocrite!

You've got a lot of gall to say that someone shouldn't flame other people or say what is and isn't biphobic.

[DiamondDog]

I use to post on a gay message board that had a decent bisexual section til I realized the moderators pretty much hate bisexual guys. I got into a debate that got pretty ugly with a poster who was also bi who said we should be quiet about our bisexuality,its nothing to be proud of,we're all not really bi, and so on.Anyway, I saw this and it made my blood boil. I can't reply because I'll probably get banned from that board(they don't like it when you disagree with them) Anyway, I just needed to vent and share this crap.

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Interesting Topic for sure.
I've Heard/Read/Experienced that Men are not actually capable of being Bisexual. that if one believes they are bisexual they are either 1) Unsure of their orientation so decides to choose the either-way way. or 2) is sexually promiscuous and basically has an urge to have sexual relations with either sexes.

But apparently not actually be Bi.

Now personally i believe this, because once upon a time i was "Bi" and now i'm obviously full fledged Gay. and i've had guys tell me they're bi and i think to myself "just give it some time" and a week or two weeks or a couple months later i learn that they are infact Fully Gay. or Fully Straight. But NEVER Bi.

Now i'm sure there are people out there who are bi and/or think they are bi. and just wondering what you have to say. Remember this is just a study i read a while back (or saw it on tv i don't remember it was a long time ago.) so it's not just me going off on a tangent.

Is this true? are there some gay guys out there that once upon time thought you were gay? lemme know. and any other experiences you have had relating to this topic.

If you head over and post be warned,its not a very bifriendly place to post.

http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=191600

Who is the poster that's also bi who you got into a big fight with? I never saw that.

I also post on the forum there and I've been there for awhile.

It used to be a lot worse with the biphobia, and there wasn't a bi forum at all, and they were way more PC and touchy about things.

Also the moderators there don't resent creating a bi forum.

You won't get banned from that fourm since I've seen people post way worse stuff and not get banned at all.

You can't change a bigot's mind or an idiot's mind and the people who post things like that just want to get a rise out of people.

Here's something that I read on the forums there before that someone else wrote that I agree with:

>you're wasting your time because of the reason for their contempt. it's an us vs. them thing...they want you to pick a side cause like straight people who are scared of gays, these guys are scared of bi's. and they're more than a little jealous. i really believe that. plus, they all covet straight dudes...someone once pointed out to me that soilwork specifically makes a living of fratmen which is a gay site with "straight" and "bi" guys...can you smell that? it's the stink of hypocrisy.<


All places can be biphobic even this site. I've read posts by the mage where he wrote that ALL/most women who get HIV supposedly somehow get it from bisexual men who cheat on them with other men and this too is biphobia and it's outdated, which isn't to say that it never happens but the idea that bi men are somehow the #1 link to women getting HIV is biphobic and outdated since it's over 25 years old and hasn't been proven to be true.

I've even seen homophobic posts here on bisexual.com and so have other posters here.

[the mage]

DD you remain a dangerous little boy, undeterred by facts you plow on trying to spread your version of reality.
Do go on, I no longer care.

Play safe...
Don't lie to your spouse.

[Bluebiyou]

Bisexuality doesn't exist....
hmmm
Remembering Descartes,
I've stopped thinking therefore I... "poof":yikes2:

[Promising Galahad]

DiamondDog the Op and I get along great. I sent him a PM and we exchanged messages back and fourth. He's actually cool. The OP saw this and posted it. I thought it was coming from him. It was actually the moderators who started it. They started in on me as if I was starting trouble. They closed the thread as a result to 'my attitude'. I have recieved about 8 PM's from others who say the biphobia on the bisexual board over there is terrible. They don;t even try to hide it. I suggested getting a bisexual to moderate the bisexual board and thats when they got really pissy. I posted this on here and a few other sites. I guess people have been signing up just to send PM's to Mods.Anyway, they more or less appologized in a very flimsy manner in private. I told them to make it public.They had no problem lashing me in the center of town on the open message board. If your truly sorry appoligize. Well, its been since 10:00 this morning and I hear crickets. The mods over there are like policemen with tazers. They are gay men who resent bisexuals and they are drunk with power.

[bigregory]

Justusboys HHmmm let's think about the name of the site.
Now think about one called three pillows:male::
::male::female:
:female::male::female::male::male::female::female:
A gay site will not support us bi's so why bother trying...:bipride:

[Mimi]

promising galahad,

i just ran across this thread (haven't been active on this site for quite some time) and was stirred to respond. i really, really commend you on your speaking out on a very monosexist gay male site and your intelligent and mature approach to the problem. i'm a bi female and so don't experience the same time of skepticism from gay men, but i've had a few baffling conversations with gay male friends who are totally accepting of MY bisexuality but are quick to question a GUY'S bisexuality. it is just so startling how resistant they are to even consider the idea that there could be a man who loves both men and women. i have even noted and told them to their face that THEY SOUND LIKE STRAIGHT MEN WHEN THEY SAY THAT.

so as a bi activist and scholar, here are some of my ideas about why gay men are so resistant to male bisexuality:

1) they have completely bought into mainstream society's message (straight men's message, i might add) that every woman is bisexual and no man is bisexual.

2) they are being sexist. what i mean is that they have bought into the idea that men are better sex partners and better lovers than women simply because men are better than women (hah!).

3) they have their own unexplored bisexual feelings. and i say this from reading about studies where "gay" men have admitted that b/c it was so hard for them to come out as gay in this society that it pains them to even consider the possibility that they may be bi and have to come out all over again. i also say this from some personal experience with me "gay" male friends who seem to have "crushes" on me even though they identify as gay.

maybe as a community, we can figure out some way to challenge this monosexism as a united front, and i'm happy to hear that some of that happened here.

best,
mimi

[Azrael]

A gay site will not support us bi's so why bother trying...:bipride:

Because their struggle is ours. Many Gay people I've known have shared wisdom and love without judgement. Many early gay rights activists were closet bis. We're challenging many the same stereotypes about what is "normal and acceptable".
Not trying to be a dick, really.

[DiamondDog]

well he appologised:
http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?p=3414080#post3414080

[Promising Galahad]

Mimi, thanks for the kind words and encouragement. It means alot. I've had alot of it over the past day or two and each person who takes the time and shows me their supports makes me want to reach out and hug them. Your support means more than you know. Many thanks. I also think your right on the money with your theories on guys. As a guy, I often say,"men are such pigs thank God I'm not one!" it usually genetrates a laugh along with some confusion.

Yeah, he did appologize but I don't think he should have.I at first was angry and lashed out but I feel I did it in the proper way. We exchanged some PM's and the guy just wasn;t very clear. That was his only crime. He saw it on another board and posted it wanting to know a bisexuals opinions. He sort of agreed with it but didn't write and in my opinion after talking with him is not biphobic at all.

My problem shiffted and it became clear the moderators were accusing me of starting trouble by giving "my side of the story". I heard from others and did some reseacrhc and found many similar posts where the Mods stick up for the gays who insult the bisexuals on the bisexual board and target the Bi's. I don't even think the Mods are trying to hide it. My question is, then why have a bisexual section on the gay message baords then? It sounds like they did it out of presure and roll their eyes for having it up there. There was a post where someone(another gay) asked if homosexuality was a choice. The angry,hostile,bitchy posts that followed were like high drama at its worst. The Mod's had no problem with that or the angry responses. This post was no different. Only difference was the word 'Homosexual" was replaced with "Bisexual". A totally different set of rules and standards followed.

So, as for now the drama is over. I'd rather have the Mods appologize than the OP.I still enocurage people to go over and sign up.It looks as if they have alot of bisexuals over there who just don't bother because anything they say in the bisexual section is countered or highjacked by gay men who are biphobic. Under the appology someone said it was ME who should have appologized and "That Some Bisexuals" are just to sensitive and touchy.

[Mimi]

it is interesting that there would be a bi section on such a bi-phobic site. maybe they think that the bi men will eventually identify as gay anyway, so the bi section is more like a "waiting room." boy, did they get a surprise from you, a real bisexual! ;)

maybe you can send this to them:


What Does Biphobia Look Like?

(Taken from the Bisexual Resource Center website: http://www.biresource.org/pamphlets/biphobia.html)


Assuming that everyone you meet is either heterosexual or homosexual.
Supporting and understanding a bisexual identity for young people because you identified "that way" before you came to your "real" lesbian/gay/heterosexual identity.
Expecting a bisexual to identify as heterosexual when coupled with the "opposite" gender/sex .
Believing bisexual men spread AIDS/HIV and other STDs to heterosexuals.
Thinking bisexual people haven't made up their minds.
Assuming a bisexual person would want to fulfill your sexual fantasies or curiosities.
Assuming bisexuals would be willing to "pass" as anything other than bisexual.
Feeling that bisexual people are too outspoken and pushy about their visibility and rights.
Automatically assuming romantic couplings of two women are lesbian, or two men are gay, or a man and a woman are heterosexual.
Expecting bisexual people to get services, information and education from heterosexual service agencies for their "heterosexual side" (sic) and then go to gay and/or lesbian service agencies for their "homosexual side" (sic).
Feeling bisexuals just want to have their cake and eat it too.
Believing that bisexual women spread AIDS/HIV and other STDs to lesbians.
Using the terms "phase" or "stage" or "confused" or "fence-sitter" or "bisexual" or "AC/DC" or "switchhitter" as slurs or in an accusatory way.
Thinking bisexuals only have committed relationships with "opposite" sex/gender partners.
Looking at a bisexual person and automatically thinking of their sexuality rather than seeing them as a whole, complete person.
Believing bisexuals are confused about their sexuality.
Assuming that bisexuals, if given the choice, would prefer to be within an "opposite" gender/sex coupling to reap the social benefits of a "heterosexual" pairing.
Not confronting a biphobic remark or joke for fear of being identified as bisexual.
Assuming bisexual means "available."
Thinking that bisexual people will have their rights when lesbian and gay people win theirs.
Being gay or lesbian and asking your bisexual friend about their lover only when that lover is the same sex/gender.
Feeling that you can't trust a bisexual because they aren't really gay or lesbian, or aren't really heterosexual.
Thinking that people identify as bisexual because it's "trendy".
Expecting a bisexual to identify as gay or lesbian when coupled with the "same" sex/gender.
Expecting bisexual activists and organizers to minimize bisexual issues (i.e. HIV/AIDS, violence, basic civil rights, fighting the Right, military, same sex marriage, child custody, adoption, etc.) and to prioritize the visibility of "lesbian and/or gay" issues.
Avoid mentioning to friends that you are involved with a bisexual or working with a bisexual group because you are afraid they will think you are a bisexual.


i've sent this list to AMBI (A Meeting of Bi Individuals), the bi social/activism group that i lead in los angeles. i encouraged everyone to forward it, post it, put it on car windows, send it with holiday cards, etc. :bigrin:

mimi

[DiamondDog]

it is interesting that there would be a bi section on such a bi-phobic site. maybe they think that the bi men will eventually identify as gay anyway, so the bi section is more like a "waiting room." boy, did they get a surprise from you, a real bisexual! ;)

Actually the site's bisexual section isn't meant for that purpose.

It's meant for the discussion of bisexuality and the site isn't that monosexist or catered towards only gay men since there are people of all genders/orientations who post there and there's even a section for hetero men and women.

The site itself isn't biphobic and some of the posters there are but you'll find that everywhere even in society. I've seen racist posts there, misogynistic posts, and even homophobic posts. Yet I wouldn't call the site any of those things.

Like I wrote before, people should write publically on the fourms there about how biphobic it is or set up rules with the moderators or something about what can and can't be posted or which threads deserve to be locked/deleted/etc.

Nothing's going to change if people just keep quiet there and just whine to themselves, and don't actually do anything.

[Bluebiyou]

My take on biphobia by gay men.
In their battle to embrace their own homosexuality, they threw out the baby with the bathwater and rejected heterosexuality, to the point that now (some) gay men are too self righteous to allow the possibility of heterosexuality (since they've already 'fought that battle') in themselves and therefore... in virtueistic traits. Therefore, any 'trace' heterosexuality must be a mistake in themselves and others; bi men must therefore be confused.

I think that... POOF!

(Descartes' revenge)

[MissySue]

Blue, I agree with you. And, it goes both ways. TRUE bisexuality is not accepted by 99% of people, gay or straight. But now, fake bisexuality for women is not only accepted, but encouraged. In a completely fake way. It pisses me off beyond belief. I am now considered "trying to turn men on" if I tell someone I'm bisexual. It's depressing, but I say screw 'em. They will learn.

[mannysg]

promising galahad,


1) they have completely bought into mainstream society's message (straight men's message, i might add) that every woman is bisexual and no man is bisexual.



You are so right that this is the attitude of so many people, straight and gay alike. That atitude is something that really ticks me off.

I frequent a few newsgroups where people post pics of themselves. Anytime someone posts pics of a guy being penetrated anally, the "GAY" comments come flying, even if the poster is married and the pics are of his wife using a dildo/strapon/vibrator on him. Hell, the woman might as well not be in the pic since all the viewer comments are about the guy in the pic being gay.
I posgted a positive comment once, and right away I was called "GAY".

THere is nothing wrong with someone being gay, but why in the HELL am I "GAY" if I like men? FOrget that I am happily married and that I prefer women. That means nothing apparently since my desire to have sex with another man makes me GAY, not BI, but GAY.

On the other hand, pics of 2 women having sex is not only accepted, but applauded, especially if one or both of them are in a heterosexual marriage.

:::: GEtting off my soapbox now. Sorry to go off Mimi. I know that "no man is bisexual" isn't what you believe, it's what society believes.
******************


promising galahad,

THEY SOUND LIKE STRAIGHT MEN WHEN THEY SAY THAT.


I like that come-back! IT can also be used on a straight person, i.e. "You sound like gay men when they say that"

[darkeyes]

Blue, I agree with you. And, it goes both ways. TRUE bisexuality is not accepted by 99% of people, gay or straight. But now, fake bisexuality for women is not only accepted, but encouraged. In a completely fake way. It pisses me off beyond belief. I am now considered "trying to turn men on" if I tell someone I'm bisexual. It's depressing, but I say screw 'em. They will learn.

Scuse me...cudya elaborate on jus wotya mean by"fake bisexuality for women"????

[The Barefoot Contess]

TRUE bisexuality is not accepted by 99% of people, gay or straight. But now, fake bisexuality for women is not only accepted, but encouraged. In a completely fake way.

I don't understand what you mean with "true" and "fake". Could you explain?

[gh05t]

Then what am I?

[darkeyes]

Then what am I?
Wy hun.. yas a ghostie.. a spirit of the ether... insubstantial bein of ancient superstition... a myth... an hallucination... a figment of ya own overactive imagination.. an a million otha things of no consequence... God babes... ya didn think ya wer reel didya???? Ya daft bugga!!!

[*pan*]

i just hate labels dont you, there a way to catagorize and seperate, it's a way to divide and conqure, lables are mans way of putting him self above othere's, or to catagorize himself with what he sees or feels is right, "thoes who forget history are doomed to repeat it". and in past history i see not much good comming from labeling someone. such as comes from labels are the ones associated with race, religion, politics, ect... and now even sexuality such as gay which opens the door for the none gays to scorn and make other labels such as fag, queer, homo ect.... not to mention the hatreds, scorn and harm that the other catigories develop, and so goes the other names that go with other labels, bisexual to me is just a way to say , "hay!!! i play with men too". i have found that people who group them selves with lables tend to scorn or find faults with others of different sexual orentation, different beliefs in politics or religion or what ever the catogory. this is a human behaviour associated with the need to belong, fear, guilt or whatever. thats why i'm not into catagorizing people, i am what i am, i like sex with either as the situation permits. i dont dislike woman or men for what ever reason as some do. i feel go and "do as you will as long as it harms none". and please don't dislike me because i am different or maby because i am getting more sex then you. lol :bigrin:

[DiamondDog]

http://www.justusboys.com/forum/showthread.php?t=192139