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[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Don't get me wrong; I liked the guy - I just didn't like him enough to submit to his request. I can't honestly say that I wasn't interested because, sure, here was a guy who had passed my "asshole test" who wanted to blow me but I still wasn't of a mind to start something that I felt I wouldn't be able to finish and given my relationship status: I had a wife, we both had girlfriends that we both shared (think of it as me being "married" to three women) and I just didn't have any room in my life to maybe wind up with a boyfriend. I didn't have a problem hooking up with guys when I wanted to but I was getting that "boyfriend vibe" from Barry and, nope - wasn't feeling that at all.

And I told him this and he said that he understood what I had to say... but he still wanted to "work that dick" and I asked him why this was such a big deal for him... and listened to him telling me what he thought about me as a man and, whew, it was beyond flattering. He had said, "I dunno... there's just something about you that's telling me I need to work that dick so I gotta work it... provided I can convince you to let me do that. You're a tough nut to crack, you know that, don't you?"

I figured that he'd eventually give up... and I was very wrong about that. Back in the day, shit - I used to be very easy to get into bed but years of experiences taught me to not be so easy and, importantly, not allow myself to be "pressured" into doing anything I didn't want to do. But Barry was persistent if nothing else and I had to admire that. I remember talking to my wife about him, voicing my concerns about him, and she said, "Look... if all he wants to do is suck your dick, what's it gonna hurt to let him blow you? He did tell you that he didn't need you as a boyfriend, right?"

"He did," I said.

"So, is it gonna kill you to let him suck you?" she asked.

"I guess not," I had to admit.

I even talked with my first "extra wife" about it, the one who couldn't understand why I liked sucking dick and even she said - and correctly so - that he was just gonna keep at me until he got what he wanted. "It seems to me that if you want to get him off your case, just give him what he wants... and stop acting like a little bitch about it."

Strong words... but she was right - I was being a little bitch about it. I'm not sure what made me think that Barry would be a complication in my life I didn't want or need but when the woman who wasn't all that comfortable with my bisexuality is telling me to just let the guy blow me, there was only one thing to do.

And I was praying that I wasn't going to regret it.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=3][FONT=verdana]​"Barry" was a slightly effeminate gay man I'd met who was smart, affable, not bad looking... and a pain in my ass. I met him during a work function and once the booze got to flowing, he went from talking shop to hitting on me, not aggressively, mind you, but making it clear that he would have no objections to being naked with me. During our talk, yeah, I told him I was bi and a part of me was hoping that upon hearing this, he'd do what a lot of gay guys tended to do to find out I was "one of those guys..." but no - that seemed to encourage him.

As the function came to an end, he said he was going to stay in touch with me because - and this is an exact quote - "I want to work that dick!" He'd said that quite a few times, giving me the impression that he'd want me to fuck him but I wasn't feeling him like that and kinda hinted "strongly" at that - again, trying to deter him while not being rude or insensitive. He said that was okay with him but, I dunno, maybe whatever he had been drinking made him bold but he said that he was sure he could change my mind about that but clarified his statement by just saying that he wanted to blow me.

And adding that if he could do that after the function was over, he was confident that I wouldn't regret it. I was sure I wouldn't but, nah, he was just a bit too "girly" for my liking and I still very much remembered the last time an effeminate gay guy focused his attention on me. I didn't commit to anything or make any promises; I fully believe in not starting anything I don't intend on finishing.

The next several days after the function, I found myself suffering from a bad case of Barry. Lots of emails from him about how nice it was to have met me, lots of invitations to go to lunch; nothing that I felt was being annoyingly aggressive but it was clear that he wanted what he wanted. I wouldn't say that he was trying to seduce me but I will say that he took every opportunity he had to convince me that I should let him "work that dick" and the sooner, the better.[/FONT][/SIZE]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Herm traded places with the other guy - we never heard what his name was; Herm took a moment to suck the other guy’s dick until it was big and hard again before getting on his knees so the other man could do it to him.

Herm said, “Damn that dick is big!” as the other man started fucking him. My own dick was hard again and it was aching something fierce! I looked at my friend and could tell his dick was hard again, too, and as much as I wanted to stay and watch the two grownups, I knew that if me and my friend didn’t do it, both of us would have blue balls, which I thought was funny since it never looked like my balls were blue when they would hurt.

So we snuck off to another room and sucked in each other’s dick - and the same way Herm and the other man had done - until we shot our stuff into each other’s mouth. We even did it to each other while being on our knees; it made my knees hurt and get a little scraped but, wow, it felt really good. My knees got even more scraped up as I did it to my friend but I didn’t care - I wanted to shoot my stuff so we could get out of there before Herm and that other man found us...

And made us suck their very big dicks and stick them in our butts. Turned out we were worried about nothing; when we were leaving we peeked in the room they were in and they were already gone.

But that night, I dreamed about Herm and that other man and how exciting it was to see two grownups doing it to each other.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]The other guy had been cussing and saying how good it felt but then he said, “From the back!”

Herm pulled his dick out and my knees got weak again to see how much dick was coming out; I thought if we got caught and this Herm guy wanted to do it to me, it was really going to hurt and I was getting scared enough to change my mind about it being a good thing.

I almost jumped out of my skin and shit myself when my friend tapped me on the shoulder and I almost punched him, too. He wanted me to move over a little and I did and in time for us to see the other guy on his knees and Herm putting his dick back in.

”I didn’t know you could be on your knees!” my friend whispered. “We always do it laying flat!”

I just nodded because I now had a good view of Herm’s long, fat dick going in and out of the other guy’s butt... and I shot my stuff again and making more of a mess in my underwear and pants.

My friend pointed at the big wet spot I made and acted like he was laughing - but I pointed at his to make him stop. And we both went back to watching the two grownups. Herm finally shot his stuff and the noises he made were scary. He pulled his dick out and said to the other guys, “C’mon, do me so we can get out of here!”[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]The man whose back was to is stopped sucking the other man’s dick and said, “I gotta cum!” and I added this word to me growing sexual vocabulary. The man who said it starting fucking the other man’s mouth until she shuddered like he was freezing, cried out, “Shit!” and I think we both knew he was shooting his stuff into the other man’s mouth.

My friend groaned and I looked at him just in time to see a wet spot in the front of his pants that was getting bigger... and I knew he hadn’t peed on himself. To be honest, I didn’t know why I hadn’t shot in my own pants but it sure felt like it!

The man who had shot said, “C’mon, Herm - stick that big motherfucker in me!” As they moved around, I almost pissed myself because they both looked toward the door and I just knew they saw us!

My friend said, “If they see us, they’re gonna do it to us!” and I knew he was scared... but I wasn’t and thought if they caught us looking and wanted to do it to me, okay - wouldn’t be the first time I had some grown up dick.

But I whispered, “Shh!” - they hadn’t seen us because Herm was crawling between the other man’s legs, which were spread really wide and from where we stood, we could see Herm’s really gigantic dick as he pushed it into the other man’s butt.

The man groaned and said, “Shit, you make it hurt real good!” then wrapped his legs around Herm and Herm started to fuck him. We both gasped to watch Herm really ducking the other guy really hard and fast and like we would do if we were in a hurry. But maybe five minutes later, I figured they weren’t in a hurry because Herm was still fucking hard and fast,

I shot my stuff into my underwear and I almost fell down and I bit my lip so hard to not cry out that I could taste blood. My friend was sitting on the floor looking dazed and the spot in his pants was much bigger.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I remember the day when I got to see two grown-up men doing it to each other. A friend and I had decided we wanted to do it and, as usual, went to the closest “hideout” to where we were at that moment. We get there, rush inside but we heard voices - somebody else was here already!

But who? I wanted to leave and go to another hideout but my friend’s curiosity got the best of him as he said, “Let’s go see who’s here!”

Shit... we were gonna get in trouble but I went with him and we creeped towards the voices. Grown up voices. Doing the nasty voices. We got to the room where the voices were coming from and peeked into it to see two grownups, half naked and on the floor sucking each other’s dicks.

And they were huge! Longest and fattest grown up dicks I’d ever seen and I don’t know about my friend but my own dick got instantly hard taking in the sight. I still wanted to leave and more so since I didn’t recognize either of the two men... but, no - my friend wanted to watch and I didn’t feel right leaving him there by himself.

It made my knees weak to watch both dicks being made to disappear into both men’s mouths; loud slurping noises, lots of moaning going on as they lay side by side to suck each other - and I made a note of this “new” way to do it; sometimes being on the top or bottom and sucking dick could get uncomfortable.

Who knew it could be done like that, too?
[/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=3][FONT=verdana]I am happy with the decision I made about things M2M. A guy may never get to fuck me or be fucked by me... but getting his dick sucked is pretty much a guaranteed thing and I will finish the job and with the only "condition" that you suck my dick as well... because that shit feels damned good, too. It was the first thing I learned about this, the first thing I really fell in love with - but eating pussy will forever be the thing I love more than sucking cock.[/FONT]

[FONT=verdana]I have and carry no shame to be a cock sucker. I have zero qualms about wanting to spend all day sucking a guy's dick over doing any fucking because, at least for me, sucking cock is much more intimate than fucking is because, if you wanna get all spiritual about it, when I swallow his cum, I am taking and consuming him in a most intimate way; some say when you take a man's cum and consume it, you're consuming the essence of the man and partaking of his manliness, power and strength. And I guess that's one way to look at it and I can't really say if this is what's really going on.

What I do know is that I've always loved sucking cock and swallowing sperm more than being fucked and more than being the one doing the fucking. I've had fifty-five years to hone my skill, to indulge in the "nasty" pleasure it provides and if it's the only thing I wind up doing with men for the rest of my life, I'm more than good with it. But make no mistake. I'm not a submissive cock sucker; I don't worship dick and I don't play or tease the dick I'm gonna suck. I admit that I'm not sucking your dick to make you happy and as a prime reason for sucking dick - I'm a very selfish cock sucker and have paid enough dues to be... bitchy? about it and to the point where if you're not gonna suck and finish me, I have no use for you. I don't play macho cock sucking games and you can't impose your will on me. My "job" is to have fun sucking your cock until you bust your nuts wide open. And if you do it sooner, I'm good with that and if you do it later, well, I've learned to be both patient and persistent and chances are good you're gonna want to stop before I will.

Because, for me, to be any other way doesn't make sense and defeats the reason why I suck cock. I understand that some guys aren't of a mind to make me happy so that means it's on me to make myself happy... and albeit at your expense. And, if by chance, you are of a mind that I didn't suck your dick to your satisfaction, well, okay... but I still got to suck your dick, didn't I?

And that what matters the most to me. It's not romantic: It's sexual. I don't have to be into you - I just gotta like you enough to want to subject you to my cock sucking lust and if I never see you again, that's okay - I still got to suck your cock and eat your sperm, didn't I? And it's easy to get me to suck your dick: Just be clean and healthy, be of legal age to get your dick sucked by a guy and the one thing a lot of guys can't pass - don't be my idea of an asshole and, believe me, I've seen enough assholes in my life to know one when I see one so don't even try to run some bullshit at me or try telling me what you think I wanna hear - it's not gonna work. Ever.

Not submissive. Probably the most selfish cock sucker you'd ever meet. Been around the block too many times to fall for the dumb shit. And it's not about you - it's about my pleasure and if you walk away happy, then I am... but if you don't, I'm still happy... because you did get your dick sucked and your balls emptied.[/FONT][/SIZE]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]The first was I'm not a submissive cock sucker but I am a selfish one and by that I mean that I don't suck cock to make the guy attached to it happy - I do it because it gives me an extreme amount of pleasure and if it also pleases him, that works. When I first realized this about myself, I thought that I was going about this the wrong way since I'd been hearing a lot of men and women talk so much about sucking dick to make the guy happy - and even if doing the sucking didn't make them happy.

And I wasn't hearing any of that. I remember one guy who had asked me, "Don't you want to suck my cock and make me happy?" and I said, "Nope - I want to suck your cock because it makes [B]me[/B] happy." While I thought that he thought that I was just gonna be a means to his end, he wasn't happy to learn that he was a means to my end and wasn't going to blow him just to make him a happy camper. For the longest time, this "attitude" bothered me... until I realized that it didn't make any damned sense for it to bother me because it's really about me and what I want to do and why I want to do it... and if the other guy doesn't agree with any of this, well, he can turn me down and go on about his business because another guy will eventually come along who will be very happy about me sucking his dick dry - and because it makes me very, very happy.

I do it the way I feel like doing it. Fast, slow, whatever way pops into my head... and I really don't care how he wants me to do it. Oh, I do listen when they say faster, harder, slow down, deeper... and sometimes I oblige them and sometimes I hit them with a reality I learned: When I'm sucking your dick, you're not in control of anything - I am. You're at my mercy and not the other way around. The good part for you is that I want you to cum and if you do it sooner, I'm really good with it and I'm still very damned selfish because i want and need your cum in my mouth. If I spit it out because it tastes shitty - and sometimes it does - that's just the way it is... but you're gonna cum in my mouth. I don't want it on my face or anywhere other than in my mouth because it completes my pleasure and thrills me to no end to feel a dick pumping away in my mouth.

I'm not one of those cock suckers who will tell a guy I don't want my dick sucked; again, if you're not gonna suck my dick and expecting me to settle for just sucking yours, well, you're not gonna get your dick sucked and I don't give a fuck how pissed off you get about it. Why should you have all of the fun? I love a guy who loves to suck dick... but I also love a guy who wants his dick sucked and finished, too. Guys who don't want or like their dick sucked? I understand it... and I don't... but I respect their choice and decision in this even though it doesn't make me happy to have a guy suck me off... and his dick is off-limits to me.

Because if I'm nothing else, I am a cock sucker first and foremost. If there is something two guys can do together that I haven't done, it's probably because I didn't want to do it... and there aren't many things I haven't done or just won't do. But I will suck your dick and make you cum... and if you're not weird about it, I'd love for you to suck my dick and I also learned that I don't care if you're "good" at it or "bad" because I learned to appreciate the fact that someone would want to suck my dick in the first place - because they didn't have to.[/SIZE][/FONT]