[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]It's a bad word; a word that's so bad that it can make a person's guts get all watery and makes them physically ill. It's forbidden and unthinkable... yet, many a guy has learned this aspect of sex with a brother or a cousin. People will say that this trip isn't necessary, that there are other outlets available for one to experience and explore sex and that if your older brother steps to you, pull his dick out, and says, "Suck it!" you should refuse, run away as fast as you can, and rat him out to the peeps. People, you know, if they had the nerve to ask, would ask why you'd even consider having sex with your brother and, I think, without first thinking about some stuff before asking the question. Things like familiarity - you know this guy. You literally grew up with him. Probably even slept in the same room with him and it's a good bet that you've seen him naked more times than you care to think about or remember... but most of all, he's someone you can trust even if, "normally," you don't get along with as well as parents think brothers should get along. I was talking to a guy some years ago about this very thing because, as he had said, he needed to get it off his chest, not so much in a confession kind of way but he needed to be able to wrap his head around the fact - once and for all - having lots of sex (as he put it) with his brother. He told me of the day his bro came into their room agitated and pissed off, muttering to himself and cussing about something which turned out to be some girl who had just dumped him. The guy said he sat there listening to his brother rant and rave; he said that, to him, it seemed like in the one moment, his brother was going on and on about "that worthless bitch" and the next moment, his brother had asked him to suck his dick to help him out because he needed help. The guy said he heard these words and was filled with fear and panic; he said that he had told his brother no, that it was wrong and they could get into trouble... but he also said that it seemed like he blinked and the next thing he knew, he had his brother's cock in his mouth and doing his best to suck on it.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]As an adult, bleh - it's just not the same; too much shit to do, too many responsibilities that cannot be set aside or ignored like being married, dealing with the ins and outs of raising and providing for a family while trying to find both the time - and someone - who'd be interested in getting dicks out, getting them hard, and making them soft again. I'd manage all of that just fine... but it just wasn't the same, ya know? Free to act... but often lacking that real sense of freedom that comes when having sex with a guy is the only thing to be concerned with; there's no rush, no overriding sense of urgency; not much in the way of being paranoid about who's gonna find out or even getting caught in the act. When you grow up and start adulting, gone are the carefree days of summer and while sex with guys hasn't lost it's appeal and excitement... it's just not the same being in that rush of exploration when you find out that sex with guys can be, at times, even more fun and satisfying than with a girl. I miss that summer heat...[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Still, there were times when sucking dick just wasn't enough and the answer was to fuck each other. Sometimes whoever I was with would agree that, nah, we don't need to fuck - we can just suck... but at some point, we'd either agree that we should fuck or, what usually happened, is one of us would blurt out, "Fuck me! Stick it in me!" and it would be done without hesitation even though it wasn't an option to begin with. Then we'd get finished fucking each other, hit the creek again, and then sit and talk for a moment about doing the one thing we both said - or thought - we didn't need to do. We did it... and now it was just a thing to talk about how it felt, maybe what we were thinking as the other guy's dick wormed its way in and out of our butt... and the funny as hell sex sounds we'd utter. Good times... and on top of the good times we had on those days that weren't so hot that you could cook an egg on the sidewalk.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I spent a lot of those hot days at the creek, sucking dick, being sucked; fucking and being fucked. It became such a routine thing to do that the moment someone said, "Let's go to the creek!" you just knew that bringing a blanket or a towel that wouldn't be missed was the smart thing to do: Having sex on the bare ground/rocks got to be pretty uncomfortable. After a nice swim, man, there was nothing more comfortable and relaxing to have a guy on top of me and fucking me, feeling his cock moving in and out of me, listening to him grunting and moaning and just... relaxing and waiting for that moment when he'd cry out that he was gonna do it - he was gonna cum - then feeling his prick shuddering in my hole and feeling his jizz being pumped into me. Or I'm the one with my very hard dick buried in a guy's ass, relishing in the hot tightness of his hole and feeling... wicked knowing that I'm fucking that one hole that everyone said was off-limits. Listening to him telling me how good it felt while also listening for any sounds that might indicate that we'd been spotted or we were too loud and the noise would get some passerby's attention. Or, if fucking was off the table, just being there, taking turns sucking each other off until neither of us could get hard again. While it was fun if there was a group of us, it was... better if there was just two of us; we could give each other our undivided attention and didn't have to be bothered with "the whiners" who, in a group setting, would be clamoring for their chance to do it (or get it done to them). We'd suck each other off then hit the creek to cool down... then start all over again, repeating this over and over until it just wasn't gonna be done again and no matter how much we wanted - and needed - to keep doing it.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Some of us, however, knew of a way to not only escape the heat but to engage in our favorite pastime: Head to the creek. A lot of other people would have the same idea, of course, but us kids had an advantage of having explored the creek along its length (and as far as we dared to) in great detail, revealing many isolated places where we could skinny dip and have sex. Sometimes, we'd go in a group but there were many of those scalding hot days where you'd roam the neighborhood looking for someone to make the trip to the creek with you, not necessarily for sex but you just kinda didn't want to go there by yourself and even that could be a problem since summertime was also that time of the year where some of us would get in trouble and either get grounded or confined to the block we lived on. But if you could find someone - or a bunch of us could make the trip - the cold waters of the creek would cool us down... so we could get heated up so the sperm could start flowing and almost like the waters of the creek did. For a lot of us, there was nothing better than spending some time in the water until we got all chilled and wrinkled, then to climb out, find a somewhat cooler spot to air dry in... and turn our attention to giving the dick - or dicks - in attendance some attention and, often, with breaks to jump into the water not only recharge our empty balls but to sluice away any sweat that covered us in the process of emptying each other's balls... and to wash away any... evidence that might be oozing out of our butts. Many areas were perfect for this. Surrounded by trees and bushes so thick that you could walk right past someone and not know that they were there and even if you heard something, good luck trying to figure out where the sound was coming from. And while most people who wander down to the creek stuck to the more popular spots to swim or fish, the area was too big to be crowded, leaving many places empty of people and giving us the privacy we needed to do what had to be done... and despite the stifling heat of the day.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Getting out of school for the summer had to be what it felt like to get out of jail - well, except for those unfortunate kids who had to spend their summer vacation going to summer school, that is. It was a time for ripping and running... and greater opportunities for us guys to get naked and have sex with each other and in any form we could get away with. While the cock sucking and ass fucking pretty much went unabated with us during the school year and in a limited way over the winter months, summer was that time for us to make up for that lost time, trying to pack it in (and literally) as much as we could because we all knew that the start of the new school year would be upon us before we knew it. On the hottest days, man... try cooling off. Only the "wealthiest" of families had air conditioning and box fans stuck in windows only served to move the hot air around more than it made things cooler inside... which made a lot of us very happy to get kicked outside even though, on some days, the air was so hot and still that not even standing in the shade of a tree made much of a difference. The city's pools - all five of them - would be overloaded with people and scrounging up ten cents to pay to get in (twenty-five cents on the weekend) was pretty hard to do and some days, it would just be too damned hot to roam the neighborhood looking for bottles to return for their deposit. We were learning that being free from the tedium of school lost it's shine in the face of those hot, steamy summer days when there were few things moving outside.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]It taught me not to have preferences and to look at other guys for who they were as a person, to pay attention to what desires they had in this and, as a part of understanding my own bisexuality better, why they were like me. And, I think, the biggest and most important thing all those white guys I'd had sex with growing up taught me was that it's really just sex and wanting to do it was the only thing that really mattered. I'd tell my friends that if we thought we were some horny motherfuckers, they really did need to meet some white guys. The funny thing is there was a white guy in our "gang" but not only did we not pay attention to the fact that he was white, we didn't really pay that much attention to how much eager he was to do it and, yeah, I even kicked my own ass because I hadn't noticed it either but I figured out that because he was one of the gang, that little difference just got overlooked. There was never a time that he didn't want to do it; he didn't care if all we did was blow each other or fucked each other - all he cared about was being able to do it and with any of us that wanted to. I even talked to him about what I had discovered, hoping he might be able to shed some light on this... and he just kinda shrugged and said that he had no idea why I was seeing this but, yeah, he loved doing it with other boys because it was a chance to have sex - and who didn't like having sex? If nothing else, talking to him showed me that he knew a lot more about sex than I did - not so much how to do it but what sex meant - and that made me take a very serious look at sex itself rather than what was being done. And those lessons learned so many decades ago have stayed with me. Some guys are very... uptight about this and some guys just aren't; race, again, doesn't play into either of these things because at the end of the day, it's all about what you know about sex and understanding that the only real limits are the ones we put in the way of being able to suck and fuck each other, make each other cum, and make each other feel good. And then do it again.[/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]All of this taught me some very important shit, like, race didn't matter when it came to guys doing it to other guys. While white guys were... curious about cock size, eh, it didn't matter to them, not like it was beginning to with other guys. Sure... some guys thought that doing it with a Black guy would be different but would quickly realize and understand that it really wasn't all that different since, duh, aren't we both boys? I got it into my head to ask the white guys I was having sex with why they were so... eager to do it but that got me pretty much nowhere because they'd all pretty much say that they were curious, had always wanted to try it and the expected thing that they'd done it before and just liked doing it. I had wondered if personality had anything to do with this but even that was inconclusive because guys who were bold and brash didn't seem to be all that different from the ones who were quiet and reserved. All I knew was white guys loved to do it with other guys... well, most of the time but it was clear to me that the ones who didn't had the same fears and even prejudices seen in other guys - you know, all that biblical stuff and being a queer faggot and other shit like that. Eventually, I just stopped trying to figure it out and just went with the flow of things. I'd learned that race and other shit, if it did anything else, kept me from having sex with other guys (and even girls) and that the only thing that really mattered - and should matter - was the desire to do it. Period. Skin color didn't matter. Didn't matter whether you were rich or poor; the size of your dick didn't mean anything. Having the desire and even need to do it like this - and then being unafraid to - meant everything and, well, hmm, white guys, to me, had a lot of desire and little to no fear whatsoever. But so did a lot of other guys and that made trying to nail this down even harder to do and the reason why I eventually gave up trying to figure it out.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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